41 Keys to a successful marriage

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keys to a successful marriage

To be successful in life there are keys to need for you to unlock them, likewise, in marriage. for you to have a long-last marriage you need some keys that you’d need to carry you along.

1. Trusting each other:

A popular saying says that trust is the bedrock of any relationship. What is the essence of exchanging vows and accepting to spend the rest of your life with someone you don’t really trust or trusts at all? The answer is NOTHING. In some marriages, there might have been trust at the initial but it was lost because the husband or that wife always gave reason for the other to entertain doubts which in turn gets the other to question bestowing his or her confidence on the other. This lack of trust has always led to a whole lot of marital issues if not fixed on time. The first step in building trust is being transparent and truthful.

2. Same sense of humor: Ladies love a man who can crack a joke, tickle them in the right places, make them laugh, and equally understands when something is a joke and when it’s not. Having a good sense of humor will go a long way in helping you build a happy and dream home that is not all about seriousness, strictness, and business-mindedness. It is said that where there is laughter there is peace and love.

3. Always being honest with each other: Does your wife or husband always have to launch a full-scale investigation into everything you say or do because your word, actions, and inactions always reek of dishonesty? If for any reason a partner considers the other not trustworthy, perhaps because he/she as displayed some level of dishonesty in the past

4. Remember birthdays and anniversaries:

It is always important that we remember our spouse’s birthdays, anniversaries, valentines, and all other things couples celebrate. Most times they might get too busy with work that they don’t remember. Always remind them about it, a gift card, a cake, love letters, playing them their favorite songs, and even taking them on a date can go a long way in spicing things up and keeping the love alive

5. Accepting each other’s faults:

Loving and accepting each other’s faults and understanding different people come with different personalities. All these faults and flaws are the attributes that make us unique. Do not antagonize your husband or wife because they have a little flaw in their physicality or they have misplaced tongue when it comes to pronunciation. Loving your partner means loving of bit of them that has made them stand out whether good or bad

6. Compromising:

We sometimes have to let go some of our values and believes because we want to blend into the lives of our partners. If as a bachelor you used to drink alcohol, smoke, and get in with some other unhealthy activities, we have to learn how to stop. Let’s say your wife dislikes alcohol, and but likes soda and malt. You have to compromise and accommodate with a she-likes. The same is applicable to the ladies, not compromising is making selfish decisions

7. Saying ‘I love you’ regularly:

Nothing rocks a man or woman’s world more than hearing the eight lettered word ‘I love you’, when they least expect to hear it. Always tell them how much you love them because they will never get tired of hearing it. Those words will always remind them of home

8. Knowing when to say sorry:

Saying sorry when it is necessary does not take anything away from you as a man or a woman. Say sorry when you are wrong, when they trip and fall, when they are hurt, in their darkest moments, when never really understand much sorry can do for us until we learn to say sorry. Sorry is a small but powerful word

9. Being able to laugh at each other:

Laughter is a medicine to the soul. Laugh at your partner when they make silly but amusing mistakes, say something funny, or do something funny. Always be able to brandish your 32 for them, because when you are happy they too are equally happy

10. Having a similar outlook on life:

Be able to view life the way your spouse views it. View and always try to understand life from their own perspective. Let’s say your wife believes in fairytales, you have to listen to them understand why they believe in fairytales, and try to make sense of it. If they believe that there are consequences for every action that is taken in life you also have to be of the same idea

11. Regular hugs/cuddles:

Do not be afraid to hug them, hugging does not bite or hurt. The best way to relax and catch feelings is in the arms of your lover. The moments of hugging and cuddling is a moment of boding and never let it lack in our marriage

12. Always kiss each other goodnight:

Kissing your partner goodnight guarantees them a goodnight’s sleep, it eases tension and stress levels, helps trigger the hormones that make them look younger, and it makes them dream about you, they wake up happy. A simple thing as a good night kiss can make your spouse serve you breakfast in bed

13. The occasional romantic gesture:

Never you run out of romantic gestures to put on display for your man or woman. Tickle them, hold the car door open for them, always open the door for them, buy them flowers roses, and dazes, fix them a warm bath in a tub or Jacuzzi with the rose petals and some really good fragrances, help them wash their hair, there is a lot of romantic gestures you can possibly think that would appeal to your partner.

14. Considering your partner to be your best friend:

Don’t you ever forget that your partner is your best friend for life, your number one confidence, the only person that loves you in many different ways, your soul mate, the one person that wears their heart out on their sleeves just for you. So always see your partner as your friend a friend you do not intend to lose.

15. Sharing the parenting duties:

When it comes to parenting duties, all hands should be on deck. It takes two persons to make a child but it takes a community to raise a child. Do not be the absent father or mother, take part in parenting. As the husband, you can always drop your kids off at school and also pick them up, help them with their homework, put them to bed, entertain them with really informative stories while they wait for dinner to be ready, and so on. The responsibility shouldn’t be left on the shoulders of one parent

16. Always kiss each other goodbye in the mornings:

Always leave your signature on their lips every morning before leaving for work. That way you ensure that they have a blessed and happy day, set their head straight every morning with a kiss, let the thoughts of your lips on theirs always dominate their thinking throughout the day. Just a kiss

17. Having some shared hobbies and interests:

having similar hobbies and interests will go a long way in making your marriage more adventurous and interesting. Both of you should have a flair for activity, it might be poker, board games, swimming, xbox, and other stuff like that. Whenever you get into activities like this you tend to discover that those moments are moments of bonding.

18. Always talk about a problem rather than bottling it up:

Do not bottle up anger or pretend that what they did or say do not hurt you. Try your best to straighten issues out before retiring to bed, they say a problem shared is half solved. So instead of bottling your feelings talk about your feelings, that way you can be on the same page with your spouse.

19. Ask each other about their day:

Relax and listen to your partner as they rant and foams about how much of a jerk their boss is. Allow them to tell you how the lazy cleaner spilled soup water on their desk and how they yelled their lungs out. Listen to the fun adventures that took place throughout the day and also tell them how good yours was. Being a good listener is better than being a sweet talker

20. Regular sex:

Regular sex is a key to a happy marriage. Have sex on a regular, when we say regularly when don’t mean boring and one-sided sex where only one partner is satisfied in the end. Spice up your sex life. And men always try to make your wife orgasm. Women love a man who knows how to manipulate their body in the right ways. Kiss and touch the right spots to see how they would squirm in ecstasy. Ask your wife and husband how the like, rough or slow, their favorite position, if they like oral sex always give them it, you have to make them always want more when it’s over

21. Having some different hobbies and interests:

Although you both should have similar dreams and aims. It isn’t compulsory that both of you must have similar hobbies and interests. But having similar hobbies doesn’t make your marriage a boring one. Both partners just have to find a way to make it work.

22. Knowing when to give each other some space:

understand your partner’s body language and facial expressions. Always give them space whenever they need quietness and solitude and do not push too hard when they say they want to be alone.

23. Having similar aims and ambitions:

couples should have similar dreams and ambitions, that way they would feel and understand that they are going through life alone. People are normally connected to each other by aims and ambitions. So individuals that have nothing in common can’t possibly stand the test of time in marriage.

24. Continuing to make an effort to look nice for your partner:

most cheating partners will most times say that their partner stops looking good, they don’t dress fine like they used to do before, they put on weight, and so on. Keep a loving look for your husband or wife. Ignite their innermost desires with your looks and charms, like we said before don’t ever lose those charms and wits that keep them attracted to you.

25. Getting on with each other’s family:

To a lot of people, family comes first and they do not appreciate anybody who doesn’t get a lot with their family members. So it is important that you do not rub off on your partner’s close family member the wrong way. Try to at least make a get along with the family members that are important to them.

26. Holding hands when you are out and about:

hold hands with them when you are out, women tend to squirm for men who publicly show affection to them. Hold hands with her and gently squeeze their hands, let them feel warm and secure in your hands. Regularly kiss their hands at intervals

27. Regularly complimenting each other:

regularly compliment your spouse, compliment her about how good she looks, how a wonderful cook she is, tell him how handsome he is, shower them with the most amazing words you can ever find in your vocabulary reserve. If you don’t tell them that they complete your world, someone else is definitely be complimenting them, and the outcome might not be too pleasant for you.

28. Two TVs in the house:

a lot of marriage has been taken to courts for dissolution because of a simple tv show. Men can’t afford to miss their EPL games and women can’t let go of their favorite zee world, Telemundo and telenovela. So to avoid unnecessary fight and arguments it is advisable to have two TVs at home

29. Still shaving/grooming:

always shave regularly, look clean and fresh for your husband or wife. Those attributes that made them get attracted to you should be left behind because you finally succeeded in wooing them with those well-trimmed beards or the carved eyelashes. Keep your pubic region clean, your armpits shouldn’t be too bushy, throw on some perfumes smell well as much as you can. Do not lose your charms and wits

30. Having regular nights out with friends, without your partner:

do not be too clingy with your partner, always give them the needed space to hang out the family and friends. Remember that their world doesn’t stop because you come around, they probably had a lifestyle before they met you, though they will have to forgo some habits. But you still have to let them into some old habits that are not harmful, like going out with friends.

31. Surprise gifts/presents:

thrill your partners with spontaneous gifts. It doesn’t necessarily have to be an expensive gift package. They say that it’s the little thing we do is what matters, so always understand that the best gifts are given from the heart and also received from the heart. Learn to always accept the little gift that your partner gives to you.

32. Not being friends with ANY ex-partners on Facebook:

Keep all your EX’s far away from yourself and your partner. The simplest text message or voice notes such as “I miss you” can set the marriage you have built for a long time crumbling to the ground. Leave your past at the past, you have to believe that your exes can never have your best interest at heart. So to avoid putting yourself on the spot, stay away from your ex’s.

33. A rota to divide up the household chores:

household chores, housekeeping, and management should be a shared responsibility. The woman shouldn’t be the work course of the house, men should always help out the best way they can. Do you know how romantic it is for your woman to walk in on you in the kitchen seeing you doing the dishes? A lot of women would kill to have a man like that. So with that said, household activities shouldn’t be the woman’s responsibility alone.

34. Regular date nights:

Make out time to take your wife/husband on a date. Take out to see the fountains, cinemas, zoos, a restaurant, even ride on the merry go round wheels with them. Buy the chocolates and flowers while on the date. Make them feel special

35. Two bathrooms/toilets:

Having separate bathrooms and toilets does not help in strengthening the bond, closeness and intimacy between partners. Bath them and bath together, because it is good for your marriage

36. Not having one person hogging the remote control:

Always try to have similar working hours. Do not be at home when your wife/husband is at work. Or close off at work a lot earlier than your spouse. If you do as the man always head to her workplace and pick her up and walk or drive home together while chit chatting or enjoying the silence. It means a lot to women

37. Similar working hours:

having similar working hours doesn’t necessarily mean that both of you should start work at the same time and close at the same time. It means one shouldn’t be working at odd hours such as midnight or even working during public holidays and during family weekends. It is important that we understand that family comes first.

38. Knowing each other’s passcode for their phone:

If your cellphone is not a ticking time bomb that will blow up your marriage when it is not a passcode with heavy encryption codes then don’t lock your phone and not allow them to know your code. Always grant them free access into your gadgets If you have nothing to hide, this would make them last suspicious of you

39. A secret stash of cash they know nothing about:

Do not have secret cash somewhere in the name of contingency. Having a secret stash of cash somewhere can only suggest that you are not honest or that you are cheating. Do not stash money away, all cash and valuables should always be brought to the notice of your partners

40. Keeping some things private (not going to the toilet in front of each other etc):

Always try to not overexpose your disgusting sides to your partner. Do not use the toilet in their presence because it might disgust them seeing someone they adore as an angel messing up.

41. A night or two a week where neither of you uses computers/laptops/phones etc:

modern marriages have now being overrun by gadgets, phones, laptops, and social media. Nowadays everything and everybody is all about chasing the clout. Surprisingly 21st-century marriages now compete on who’s lifestyle is going to trend the most on the social media space. Do not present a united front to the media, meanwhile in reality you don’t even remember your husband or wife’s birthday all because we now rely on Facebook to remind us. Put those fancy gadgets away, the iPhones and MacBooks won’t miss you. Your spouse needs you, your partner misses you.

ALSO, READ Relationship and Marriage  Quotes by Reno Omokri

 

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