Last Updated on July 26, 2022 by Joshua Isibor
In this article, we’ll be talking about amazing ways to deal with a stubborn child. Have you ever had the feeling just to throw a child out because you can no longer deal with his stubbornness? What about the child that throws tantrums even when you have tried everything, you know? Watch it! That child is going to give you some stress.
What about the child that breaks everything in the house? That child that turns the house inside out. That child that cannot sit still. That child that disputes and offends you. That child that does the exact opposite of what you say. Gosh! Parenting is a wonder.
I remember babysitting for my lecturer back then in my university days, and the baby just wouldn’t stop crying. Did I say crying? I meant wailing. I did everything I knew, but it just wouldn’t stop crying. I find it amusing every time I remember that day. I believe we all know a child that we can describe as stubborn.
As a parent, you probably find yourself wishing the stubborn child was like your other children. The ones that don’t argue with you. The ones that do their homework. The ones that obey and are just so adorable.
Don’t fret too much about that stubborn child because everyone is created differently (different character, behavior, and manners). It appears some children are born stubborn. Is it not amazing that nobody teaches a child to be stubborn? This is why, as a parent, you must see stubbornness as a WARFARE. It is no joke, and you must treat the stubbornness in your child with the same intensity.
Stubbornness could be a trait exhibited by a child right from infancy, although children tend to be more stubborn at their young age. This is the stage of their lives where they form their thoughts and just want to be independent, thus creating an idea conflict.
Noteworthy is that STUBBORNNESS can also be genetic or even generated by peer influence. Parenting is stressful, and heaven meshed together. A cup of sour and sweet. Fulfilling yet exhausting and failing is not an option.
For a clearer understanding, let’s attempt to conceptualize the word ‘stubborn.’ To be stubborn is to refuse to change thought, behavior, or action under any external pressure.
As you know, a child is a gift from God, and you shouldn’t feel anger or resentment as a parent with your child because he/she is stubborn. Most parents, after a while, just give up on a stubborn child. However, we have seen that children should be treated according to their behavior traits. The way you treat child A should not be the same with child B.
THE CHARACTERISTIC S OF A STUBBORN CHILD
1.They tend to do things as they like.
2.Some of them have leadership skills. And can have this dominating character.
3.They are Hot-tempered in Nature.
4.They always want to get what they want, even if it means breaking the rules.
5.They think they are always Right.
6., They argue a lot.
7.They refuse correction.
8.They want to learn things for themselves rather than accepting what others say,
How to Deal with a Stubborn Child
1. Constantly correct them in Love
: This is an act of telling the child what he did peacefully and encouragingly. Correcting a stubborn child with love is the best way of counseling a child. However, this application might not be a powerful tool for a child of 6years old. In the case of a six years old child, you could correct them by giving them punishment.
Someone told me this parable, and it says, “When you plant a mango tree as it is growing(for the first 2month) if it bends you can straighten it, but when it has grown big for like 2years, and it gets bent, you can never straighten it.
So you must start disciplining your child early. Don’t wait until your child is grown before he/she is disciplined because, at that point, your child will no longer value your opinion.
2. Pay listening ears to them:
Whenever your child is saying something always pay listening ears to hear their view because he might have a perspective that makes him hold quick to his position, he/she is attempting to secure something that appears to be essential to her.
It is only by listening serenely to her and mirroring her words you will come to comprehend what’s causing her to contradict you. Attacking a Stubborn child would only make things worse and even make him/her more stubborn. As they say, two wrongs cannot make a right.
3. Implement rules and Routine:
In a home where there is no rule, the people are bound to suffer. Rules and routines are needed to put them in the right order. Adhering to day-by-day schedules and weekly routines can help improve your youngsters, especially when they are very young.
Try as much as possible to make sure you have rules and routine guiding them because when you don’t do this, it will give them room to misbehave.
4. Reinforce positive behavior:
Always react with a positive attitude. Don’t say NO to everything a Child asks you. The more you say NO to everything, the MORE they’ll say NO to you in Future. Sometimes you can negotiate.
5. Use your vocabulary wisely:
A stubborn Child is super sensitive about how you react and treat them, especially your words. Stop lowering your child’s esteem with your words. Don’t make your child assume he/she will never amount to anything good.
Don’t be so rude to them, and also don’t be aggressive. Be careful, or your child will seek word approval in the wrong places.
6.Set up a Connection:
Do not force your child to do something they do not want. This will only make them more rebellious and bent on doing what they are not supposed to do. So, if you want your child to stop watching television, and do homework instead, try watching television with him or her for a while.
This will bring in some camaraderie, and after a short while, you can ask your child if they’d like to do homework as you read your book or do some work sitting close by. A child learns and does by observation. You are your child’s first role model.
7. Create a peaceful environment:
A child might be stubborn naturally, but remember children learn faster with pictures and can imitate things fast. Hence, as a parent, you should try as much as possible to avoid the habit of arguing with friends, spouses, or neighbors.
8. Avoid comparing your child with other kids, especially siblings:
This is common among many parents out there, and it’s really bad because it can cause the following:
- it can foster rivalry among siblings
- He’ll start keeping away from you because he feels insecure and would want to distance from you.
- It suppresses talent and creativity.
- Have time for them: Don’t just abandon them with hatred, play with them, and become addicted to you. Because when they get addicted to you no matter how stubborn they are to you, they will still submit to your lordship.
I pray you to deal with that you find enough grace and strength to raise that stubborn child. Cheers to your success.
Click here to read ==>HOW TO DISCIPLINE YOUR CHILD
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