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HOW TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF
Last Updated on May 18, 2024 by Joshua Isibor
Critically speaking, falling in love with yourself is one big problem that 80% of us face. And sometimes, life makes it so hard for us to accept them. We can easily admire others, but when it comes to ourselves, it becomes a bigger problem. I am a victim of this; honestly, it took me time to accept who I am.
Falling in love with oneself can go either two ways:
-Loving who you are, or
-Accepting what you are.
Quote of life states, “Life is a big mirror, and what it reflects is what we give it.”
Whatever you put out in the world comes back to you tenfold. If you give love, love comes in return; if you give hate, it comes back.
If you find it hard to accept or fall in love with yourself, things are triggering them.
For instance, it might be your appearance, lifestyle, self-deception, jealousy, failure, guilt, worth or value in society, or thinking you aren’t good at anything you do, among many other things.
And when these thoughts keep occupying our minds, self-hatred creeps in, which can lead you to harm or bully yourself or others.
But the good news is that every problem has a solution, and its solution starts with you.
HERE ARE THE: 17 ways on how to fall in love with yourself.
1. You need to accept who and what you are:
“Self-love is not selfish. There is no way you can give love if you don’t love yourself.”
Accepting yourself is one of the keys to falling in love with yourself. Accepting who and what you are gives you the confidence to embrace life. This makes you see yourself as one of the best gifts on this earth. It makes you feel “complete.” It makes you stand up for yourself when people try to judge you or remind you of who you are.
A friend said, “Someone can never hurt you without your permission.”
It is not about what life gives you but your reaction to it. You might never like yourself because of certain things, but that’s not your fault(you are not to be blamed for what you didn’t create or do). That you don’t look good doesn’t mean you are evil.
Changing yourself for society to accept you shows that you are weak, and it doesn’t stop that way cause you keep on needing approval from people for you to be ok. If you find it difficult to accept yourself the way you are, I have some practical tips for you.
• First, list what you think makes you unique and all your negative judgments toward yourself.
• Go through them and know those that are hard to accept.
• Take those and start working on them. You might pick one and work on it every day or twice a week till you fully get used to it.
For instance, you may not like the way you look, and it is hard for you to accept that you are beautiful or ugly.
Why not take the first step by looking in the mirror whenever you wake up and saying something positive about your appearance?
I faced this kind of thing until I started speaking positively about my looks. I would stand in front of my mirror each morning and tell myself I look good. It became a habit.
Cultivating this art will make you fall deeply for yourself.
• Disconnect from whatever reminds you of those negative behaviors toward yourself. It might come from friends, music, books, and connecting yourself with those that improve your self-esteem.
• Identify your weaknesses.
You might be the type of person who procrastinates a lot, is impatient about things, is quickly bored, is shy, is scared of the public, is strict, doesn’t like to be criticized, is stubborn, or is always emotional over little things. I suggest you make a list, paste it somewhere you can see it, and work on it.
• Take every failure as an experience to do better.
• Don’t compare yourself with anybody. You are unique, and you need nobody to tell you that. What matters is how you see yourself, not how people see you.
• Learn to accept your imperfections.
The more you accept the part of yourself you don’t like, the more personal freedom you create. When you begin to see your imperfections as part of you, you start to feel free from anxiety and low self-esteem.
ALSO, READ How to fall in love? ( 13 WAYS)
2. Accept things about yourself that you can’t change.
Everybody has their flaws, but there are certain things we can’t change about ourselves. You might be fat and want to be thin, which is obtainable, as is when you are thin.
On the other hand, you might have a big nose that makes you feel uncomfortable. Instead of finding ways to reduce it, why not accept it the way it is? You can keep telling yourself, ‘This nose has its purpose, and without it, I can’t breathe.’
A lot of us( especially ladies) are faced with this kind of “body shaming” problem, which pushed some of us into opting for plastic surgery.
Embracing your flaws is the best way to love yourself madly. Our flaws are not there to make us wrong but to give us the courage to look at them as part of us that we need to improve in life.
3. Apologise to yourself.
Like the way we offend others and tend to apologize to them, do the same thing to yourself. Be comfortable admitting you disappointed yourself and find strength in knowing that it doesn’t define you.
You can write a letter of apology to yourself stating where you hurt yourself, how much sorry you feel, and how you will make it up to yourself. This sounds weird, but it is an excellent way to stay in love with yourself.
4. Forgive your past mistakes.
“One thing is for sure—you will make mistakes. Learn to learn from them. Learn to forgive yourself. Learn to laugh when everything falls apart because, sometimes, it will.” Vironika Tugaleva
How do you start to love yourself if you still hang those mistakes around your neck and wait for someone to take them off? It begins with you, and that decision can be made by you alone.
Your past mistakes should not determine your future. If you feel guilty about what you did, that’s fine! But reminiscing about them for a long time is totally out of the question.
You should seek peace of mind, and you can only achieve it by learning to forgive yourself for your past mistakes.
5. Redirect every negative thought about yourself.
This irrational and unrealistic thought comes to mind when things don’t turn out well. Inner voices keep reminding us of our inadequacies.
When we nurture them, they deteriorate our minds and cause us to believe many negative things about ourselves.
However, it is time for you to start channeling every negative thought about yourself into something good.
You might be the one who usually uses negative words about yourself. Why not say something positive even when it is hard to admit you are good?
Tips that can help you stay positive.
• Focus on the good things that happen in your life, no matter how little they seem to appear. They might be you waking up strong, a little help you rendered to someone, and many of them.
• Try turning those negative words into positive ones. You can write them down and paste them so you can see them when you wake up or go to bed.
This will help you stay positive and fall in love with yourself deeply.
• Identify your areas of negativity and work on them.
Specifically, you might be a person who quickly gets angry over something without identifying the cause. Why not tell yourself to stay calm and find out why the thing happened that way?
This will help you read deep meaning into them, which will help you sort for solutions instead of being angry at them, which might affect your mood for the rest of the day.
• Avoid things that trigger negative thoughts. These feelings may come from friends, movies, books, or co-workers. Just try your best to stay away whenever they contact you.
• Open yourself to humour. Though this part is hard to implement, try to laugh at things even when difficult. It will make them look more straightforward to solve. Watch funny videos or comedies and tell yourself you can’t let life push you the way it likes.
• Spend time with people, things that bring positive vibes. You may attend conferences and seminars, hang out, or tour beautiful places.
• Always remember to compliment yourself each day of your life.
Compliment lightens the mood, and it affects the rest of our days.
Speak positive words and pray to God to help you in all your doings.
ALSO, READ FALLING IN LOVE! – ALL YOU SHOULD KNOW
6.No more comparison.
Now, it is time for you to stop comparing yourself to others. You need to know that “you are you and not them.” They are living fine because they have money, which should be their problem and not yours. It would help if you focused on achieving a better future, living happily, and not competing with anyone else.
A friend says, “In life, the only thing that should matter to you is your happiness and how to get them.”
Comparing yourself with others will only do more harm than good. Look at their success stories as a “push” to do more rather than sitting in your shell looking for whom to blame or how life maltreats you.
7. Create a better picture of yourself in your mind.
You might want to be a great person who inspires people. Try picturing that great person in your mind, living like one, and diligently pursuing them until you finally become them.
8. Be comfortable in your skin.
The best way to fall in love with yourself is to be comfortable with your skin. This means building yourself for who and what you want to be, not what others want you to look like.
It is a little treasure box inside of you that is filled with contentment and love.
Tips on how to achieve that.
• Take good care of yourself. Spend time with yourself, eat good food, exercise, take yourself out, dress well, feed your mind with good things, spoil yourself, and ensure you stay healthy. Stop caring about what others think about you. What matters is what you feel about yourself.
• Be your own best friend. The way you make friends with people is also to make friends with yourself. If anything inside of you hinders you from loving yourself, get rid of it and replace it with something that acts like your best friend. It might be a voice or self-doubt. Replace it with someone who wants the best for you.
ALSO, READ UNDERSTANDING THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES
9. Pay Attention to yourself.
If you are the busy type who doesn’t even have time for yourself, I think it is high time you take a break and pay Attention to yourself. Listen to yourself and know where you are not getting it.
• When did you last grab a cup of good cappuccino or eat alone in a good restaurant?
• When did you last stroll around your garden picking flowers and smiling at nature?
Or the last time you visited the cinema to see good movies or wore those beautiful clothes you kept in the closet for a long?
Just take your time to pay attention to those things and see how self-love grows on its own.
10. Have fun
Enjoy your life while you can. Nobody is going to do those things for you. Take yourself out on dates, treat yourself right, go shopping, go to a spa to have a good body treatment and the benefits that come with it, go to the museum, go to a concert, grab a cup of ice cream, cook exceptional food for yourself, go biking, gaze at the stars, go swimming, learn a new musical instrument, drown in your fantasy, meditate, travel out, unplug to be alone, act like a kid and many more.
11. Invest in something you love or are good at.
It might be a career, hobby, interest, charity, or skill you want to learn or do. Explore whatever makes you happy, and see how much you can stay in love with yourself longer.
12. Reflect on your happiest moments.
Always reflect on your happiest moments, whether in the past or present. Please keep track of what created the best moments in your life and reflect on them more.
13. Take care of your environment.
Keeping our environment clean enhances our moods. You can change those things you wanted to change a long time ago. Arrange your room fashionably to lighten your mood and make you feel at peace.
14. Celebrate your accomplishments.
They said, “Name your blessings and count them individually.” It is not harmful to celebrate your little wins or accomplishments. Give yourself credit for doing more. You deserve it! It is your hard work, and you need to be honored for achieving it.
15. Be thankful
Always be thankful for the opportunities that come your way, your friends, your family, and where you have been in life.
Gratitude and appreciation should always be part of your life cause they bring more favors and blessings into our lives.
16. Learn and grow
Whatever has happened to you in life, learn from it and move on. Develop yourself into someone you will be proud of in the next ten years. Learn things you want to know, likewise reading those books you wanted to and practicing them always.
16. Music
Listen to music that improves self-love, which mellows you out and gives you room to stay on a sound track. They are good music that speaks more about self-love and boosts self-confidence, like
• I Love Me by Meghan Trainer
• survivor by destiny’s child
• Love Me by Hailee Steinfeld
• new rule by Dua Lipa and many more.
17. Love more
Give out love, and it will come back to you. Love yourself more, pour out your every love, and watch it grow. Don’t ever allow someone to talk you out of loving yourself. Treat yourself well. Love yourself as you ever wanted to be loved. It is not a must you need someone in your life before you do that, do it for yourself and see how you fall In love with yourself without any stress.
A WORD FROM RELATIONSHIP SEEDS
Self-love is one key to success in life. If you don’t treat yourself how you want to be treated, breaking the walls you want to break becomes difficult.
You deserve better, and you will give it to yourself. You came to this world alone; nobody should make you feel wrong about who you are. Give in everything and see how you reap the best fruits you ever wanted.
Always remember that you are God’s best gift; gifts are precious things that come in beautiful packages. God is love and the only one who gives selfless love. Invite him into your life. He is always ready to help you stay in love and stay happy.
ALSO, READ HOW TO LOVE AGAIN NO MATTER THE HEARTBREAK
Originally posted 2021-03-24 20:20:53.
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