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Marriage & Divorce

EFFECTIVE WAYS TO CATCH A CHEATING SPOUSE

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how to catch a cheating partner

Does your instinct tell you that your partner is cheating on you? Sometimes you know it and such thought could be devastating. Making assumptions can also be very stressful.
Ever been in a situation where you try convincing your partner about it, but they swat your concerns away and accuse you of being paranoid?.

The fact that you doubt your partner is a sign that things aren’t going all smoothly.
While being in a relationship and you are feeling insecure, always talk to your spouse because sometimes it might just be a misunderstanding and good communication would help sort things out?
But if after the aforementioned and your doubts don’t get erased, then perhaps a little snooping might be the only way to get the real answers.

HOW TO CATCH A CHEATING PARTNER (19 PROVEN WAYS)

1. VISIT UNANNOUNCED

VISITING UNANNOUNCED
You could drop by, at their place of work or home unannounced or you could simply come back at unexpected hours because most cheaters will cheat in the absence of their partners.
Be smart by not letting him/her suspect that you are spying on them. Always have an excuse as to why you have dropped by. If they are cheating on you, the first thing your partner would do is to seem surprised or even angry. Continue doing this and you might just catch them in the act if he is cheating.

2. USE GPRS/GPS TRACKING DEVICES
There are various ways you can use to track your partner’s location. One of them is the use of technologies to make things easier.
GPRS tracking devices will show you the exact location of your spouse in real-time. One example is using location spy apps or you simply go to Google maps, select “location sharing”, select share your real-time location until you turn this off.

After this, select your phone to share the location of your partner’s whereabouts.
In addition, it enables you to keep track of their location and know exactly where they were that day, you could plant a tracking device in your partner’s car.

3. PLANT A RECORDER ON THEM

hidden voice cam

hidden voice camera:
photo: amazon

A recorder can be used to catch a cheater. If you are mostly traveling or not living with your spouse, you may place it on the bed to catch sounds. You can also plant a recorder in their car seat to enable you to listen to their conversations when you are not together.

4. PRIVATE INVESTIGATOR
Hiring an investigator is also an effective way of catching a cheating partner particularly in the act.
Private investigators are personnel licensed to thoroughly look for evidence by tailing the cheating partner day and night with the hope of exposing infidelity.

5. TOUCH IDENTIFICATION FEATURE
If your spouse has a Touch ID feature(or some variant) and you have access to their phone, swiftly go in their security settings and add your fingerprints to the saved prints (if they have more than one, perhaps delete one of theirs so you don’t arouse suspicions). Congrats. You now have access to their phone no matter how many times they change their password.

6. DOWNLOAD KEYLOGGERS
These are software that can be installed in a computer and the cheating person using it would never know that it is running in the background. These programs are designed to record whatever you want, see the passwords they use, emails they send, pages they visit, and lots more. An example is The Truth spy free keylogger.

7. CHECK TEXT MESSAGES AND MORE
Try and sneak a peek at your partner’s phone if you suspect that he/she might be cheating. WhatsApp is a likelier destination for illegitimate conversations. While on it, don’t forget to check for aliases because ‘Aunt Jenny’ maybe someone else entirely (I.e April). While no software can show you how to find the true identity of a caller, there are apps like Reverse Phone Lookup App for iPhone or Call Log Monitor to track a person’s contact list and call logs to tell you exactly how many times a day this ‘Aunt Jenny’ calls.

8. CHECK THE CLOUD
Just because your partner has deleted photos from his or her computer doesn’t mean that they still don’t exist somewhere, waiting to be discovered by you. If your partner is hiding pics and selfies and other unfaithful memories, it will be in his or her cloud storage.
The basic ones may include iCloud, Google Drive, or Amazon Prime while Keep safe Photo Vault, Vault or Hide it Pro indicate something more sinister is at play.

9. CHECK THEIR RECYCLE BIN
A great place to dispose off things is the garbage. And sometimes, it also has a lot of clues. If your partner is on the computer often, check the computer’s recycleE bin often. There are chances of another person’s photo or little information that could be of some use.

10. SEX
This works better if you are a girl and dating a guy. If your boyfriend or partner comes home late from any unexpected delay, try to have spontaneous sex with them. If he gets angry and pushes you away or tries avoiding it at all cost, chances are, he may be exhausted down there.

11. CREATE A FAKE ACCOUNT

FAKE SOCIAL MEDIA AZA
Create a fake Facebook profile and add a lot of random friends to make your account seem legitimate.
Then, send an invite to your spouse and get friendly. Over a few days or weeks, start flirting with them and see how he/she responds to you. Meet up or hook up with them if they show any interest and give them the shock of their life.

12. SPYCAM
Place hidden cameras in the room where your partner hangs out most often when they want to be alone. You will soon enough know if they are over the phone or doing some funny business behind your back.

13. SNEAKING AWAY
Does your spouse use the silliest excuse to sneak out of the house once in a while or often? “I’m bored, I’m going for a ride…” ” I’m going to the grocery store… ” or something along those lines?.
That’s alright though. Ask to tag along with him and watch his reactions. If he refuses and gives lame excuses then something is definitely going on.

14. FOLLOW AFTER A FIGHT
Most cheating partners intentionally pick fights, slam the door, and walk away because it makes a great excuse to slip out of the house and meet their lover.
If recently, your spouse has been walking out of the house often after picking fights, try to follow them and see where they are headed.

15. CHECK BANK STATEMENTS OR RANDOM DOCUMENTS
Look around your home for receipts or paperwork that seems suspicious to you. Seeing what your spouse is spending their money on can be a great way to find out if they are cheating. Check also their bank statements if you have access to this to verify any unusual activity.
Anything you can find that doesn’t seem normal can be an indication that they are up to no good.

16. KEEP A JOURNAL OF YOUR SPOUSE’S REPORTED ACTIVITIES

A cheating spouse is likely to change his or her story or question your memory, so keeping a record of everything is crucial.
Write down the times, dates, places, other people involved, e.t.c.
Make sure you keep your diary in a very hidden place, he/she must not see it. You will need to be vigilant and careful because if your spouse suspects that you know of his or her behavior he might try to cover his tracks.

17. SET A TRAP
Tell your partner you are traveling and going to be out of town for a day or two. Come up with something convincing like visiting relatives, family, or friends.
Once out of the house, monitor his/her movements by seeing where/who they visit, or who gets invited into the house.

18. EAVESDROP

EVES DROP
Don’t be surprised when your partner feels hurt or angry if they catch you eavesdropping because it’s not nice to listen in on someone’s conversation, which is also generally taken as an invasion of privacy?
Nevertheless, if you feel inclined to hear what they are saying, you can;
a. Write down what you hear: This will help when discussing it with your partner and will also give you an upper hand in the argument.
b. Activate voice record in your phone: Most mobile phones have the ability to record voice data. Just activate the application and leave your phone in a place where you know your partner will go to have private discussions.

19. LOOK UP THE PLACES THEY MENTION
Businesses across all industries are uploading social updates and promoting their companies online. As such, many openly advertise upcoming business events, conferences, e.t.c.
So, if your partner tells you that they are attending a business meeting Or attending a function, ask them to repeat the name of the place or any specific information they mention and look it up on the internet. If after exploring and making inquiries and nothing clicks, your partner may have some explaining to do.

Conclusion

At this point, you have all the evidence you need to prove that your spouse is cheating, now it’s time to confront them. You just need to be prepared for what they have to say.
Whatever decision you need to make, always take your time and ensure you have a clear mind before deciding on any action, and never project the blame on yourself If they are truly cheating.
You can seek professional help or talk with the closest family and friends that can help you get through it.

ALSO, READ HOW TO DEAL WITH A SECRETIVE PARTNER

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Marriage & Divorce

How To Stop Dating A Married Man

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how to stop dating a married man

This generation of ours has made every negative thing a norm and tends to forget the absurdness of it. For example, The negativity around depression has failed to be seen as people find solace in it, speeding toxicity, another example can be seen in prostitution, where this is seen as a “Career” or a source of income. The world has failed to see the absurdness of this making women more objectified and this should not be. Another example is Dating married men, Women see this as a norm and a source of income for themselves, not thinking of the absurdness of this….They just do it without thinking!

When things like prostitution are made a norm there is a tendency that woman would date married men. Some of them do this for reasons best known to them, while some of them do it because of preference, they just prefer married men.

Some of them don’t even know why they do it, they just feel like it’s the right thing to do and they just go for it. Some of them do it to spite the wife in the marriage for one misunderstanding or the other, Some of the.do it because it was spiritually inclined into them.

But, This doesn’t mean that some of them are not tired of it, especially those ones who don’t know why they do it and feel ashamed about it, they want to stop but they don’t know how to, they have tried what they thought was right but still had the same results, and I know that you reading this right now might be one of them.

Ways to Stop Dating A Married Man

1: Acknowledge that it’s a problem

Until you see the absurdness of this you would not be able to make the decision of stopping it. Until you see why it is wrong and should not be done at all, there is every tendency that you might not make the choice of stopping. So firstly think about the absurdness, acknowledge that is wrong, and work towards your stopping it.

2: Put God first

When you acknowledge that it’s a problem, run back to the place of prayer and let God take over, sometimes spirituality is involved. Daily reading and meditating on the bible tends to change your perspective about life making you see more of the absurdness of Dating A Married Man.

ALSO, READ 18+ Proven Signs A Married Man is Unhappy in His Marriage

3: Set your priorities right:

It is said that some of them that do it and want to stop but can’t stop is because of the income they make from it, the comfort it brings and the solace added, making it their top priority. This is the excuse they have. But after acknowledging that it’s a problem and putting God first, set your priorities right.

Be independent, withdraw from that relationship, and start a life of your own, where you don’t have to rely on a man or a married man for your well-being, Establish yourself. This is one of the ways a strong woman is built, she starts by setting her priorities right.

Ways you can set your priorities right include

A: Believe in yourself:

Many women think or feel that they cannot do anything without the help of a man or a man who already knows how to take care of a woman because of his experience in marriage. But facing the fact that it is wrong and telling yourself you can do better than that, you can become who you want to become without giving yourself to a married man.

B: Do a reality check:

Look things logically, a married man would only see you as mistress and nothing more, he wouldn’t have time for you, he’d always come only when he feels like, you’re not being loved but being used. You’re not in a relationship that would lead to a happy married life, you’re just eating What you  did not cook, and what you fail to understand is the bitterness of the after taste, you’re in a relationship where you’re at the mercy of whatever he brings, whether it works for you or not.

He’s not going to meet your parents because you don’t expect him to leave his wife because of you, and if he was going to marry you, think about how his kids would feel, they would hate you for stealing their mom’s lover, can you deal with that?  Would your loved ones approve of it, ask yourself these questions.

Doing a reality check makes you come to a realization of these things.

C: Tell the wife:

This basically frees you from the guilt. Your freedom is what matters, telling the wife doesn’t make you a coward, or show your sense of irresponsibility, it only shows your level of good reasoning and good you have come to the realization of the absurdness of it. When you te the wife you are free.

D: Break up with him:

This is the point where you make that decision to cut ties and don’t go back. This is the point where your realization comes into reality. Then you can become independent.

4: Do a daily Mind exercise:

Dating Married men can be traced psychologically, as it becomes a mindset that has been embedded into you by experience, doing mind exercises can completely eradicate the thoughts of your mind. Close your eyes for ten to fifteen seconds, imagine yourself coming out of that situation or that mindset and keep working towards it by the first three things listed above.

5: Change your hobbies:

This might seem funny, but every little thing matters. Most women date married men because of their love for luxury and material things, they want everything on a platter of gold, their love for money would always cloud their mindset, and the fact that they always get it would set their hobbies to doing things that are luxury worthy. For example, Shopping every single day, reckless spending of money on things that don’t matter, etc. Therefore making these things their favorite thing to do.

So changing your hobbies to little things and finding your talent improves your probability of not dating Married men.  When you work for some things yourself and do some things by yourself without the help of anyone, you’d actually know what you actually like and what you don’t.

6: Seek Counsel:

After doing everything listed above, seeking advice from a good adult would do a great deal of detaching yourself from Dating a Married Man. A counselor would always tell the truth and give you the next line of action.

Conclusion

How to stop Dating A Married Man is a choice you have to make, a choice that has to come from the realization of the absurdness, setting your priorities right, changing your hobbies, doing a little mind exercise and seek good counsel. With a these well done, dating a married man would not even be a thought in your mind not to talk of an act!

ALSO, READ SIGNS HE WANTS TO GET YOU IN BED

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Marriage & Divorce

10 Signs You’re Ready to Get Married

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signs you're ready to get married

Description: One of the things many people fear is getting into marriage for the wrong reasons. Before you consider the idea, ensure you’re prepared to handle the responsibilities that come with marriage. Here are ten signs you’re ready for marriage.

How do you know if you are ready to get married? (10 Signs)

Because of the excitement of meeting a person you love, you might feel ready for marriage after the first date. Knowing you found the person you want to spend the rest of your life with is an incredible feeling. But no matter how you feel, marriage is not something you should take lightly. Marriage requires a lot of work, compromise, and sacrifice to maintain the relationship. Anyone craving companionship must have a few things figured out before saying “I do.” While you can borrow from installment loan lenders for your wedding, it’s something you must think about critically.

Before committing, do some soul soul-searching to know who you are and what you want. Understand the things you can give your prospective spouse and what you expect from them. Being ready for marriage means you have figured out what you want in life and are prepared to be in a relationship where you contribute and compromise. Here are signs that will help you know you’re ready for married life.

1. You’re Psychologically Mature

Some people will realize they’re not ready for marriage after 5 years of dating, and this is okay. Just because you have been out there for a long time does not qualify you to get married. Maturity is an essential component that will keep your marriage going strong amid all the turbulence. There is no best age for marriage, and you should never fall for the pressure to get married because you’re approaching a certain age. However, there’s an optimum level of maturity that shows you’re emotionally ready for marriage.

Experts say that the brain does not reach peak development until the age of 27, especially the part of the brain linked with one’s ability to review long-term consequences and also compare options. Until you have a fully working brain able to assess situations correctly, you should not get married. This is a ready-for-marriage checklist you must complete as it influences your choice of mate and ultimately determines if you’ll have a successful relationship.

2.You Love Yourself

ENSURE YOU LOVE YOURSELF

Knowing you’re ready for marriage after divorce can be confusing, as some people want to fill the void created by prior events. However, this is the time you should trackback and exercise self-love for healing. When you truly love yourself, you will easily give selfless love to others. The way you love yourself is how you teach other people to love you. Focusing on self-love before you get married is crucial as it helps you set standards that no person can undermine. Having respect for yourself means you cannot tolerate disrespect from anyone or abuse in a relationship.

Marriage comes with different stressors that test your resilience and patience. Failure to love yourself enough means it’s easy to feel lost during times of struggle. You get comfort knowing you adore yourself enough to be brave and conquer challenges in your marriage.

3. You’re Financially Stable

There are cases where you find a lady is ready for marriage, but the boyfriend is not. Some of these cases involve finances, as the boyfriend might not have attained the financial stability they believe is sufficient to take care of a family. Looking at your finances, are you ever ready for marriage? There are many perks you get from marriage if both of you are bringing income to the family. Before getting started, both of you need to evaluate your financial situation to know if it can sustain a marriage.

Money is a critical component of marriage that could make or break the relationship. Also, you don’t want to use marriage as a way to get rich as this could attract consequences later. Besides your wedding, the beginning of your marriage costs a lot – from kitchen equipment and furniture to a place to stay. Discuss finances with your partner to find common ground and understand how you can sustain the marriage if you decide to go ahead.

4. You Truly Love Your Partner

you truely love your partner

Love is among things you must confirm is present before you start thinking about how to get ready for a marriage proposal. You must love your partner for everything they are. Their personality is unique and different, so don’t attempt to change it when you get married. It’s something you need to accept and respect before you proceed with a marriage. It’s easy to tell about one’s character by looking at how they treat others. Know if they’re kind, and don’t ignore red flags that could blow up later in the marriage.

Looking at all things, you should ensure your partner is the person you want to spend the rest of your life with. Avoid falling for illusions of false expectations and face reality, which means asking yourself if you truly love that person.

5. Your Values Align

If you’re ready for marriage but your partner’s not, it could mean your values don’t align, which is a sign you should not go ahead with the plan. Having values that align makes your lives easier in the future. You need to be comfortable discussing taboo topics like sex, finance, and religion. Ladies ready for marriage should check that they’re comfortable discussing sensitive topics with their partners, as this will make it easier to know what to expect in the future. If there are clashes whenever some issues are brought up, it could mean you’ll endure stress in the marriage. People who share the same values protect their relationship from disappointment, clashes, and resentment. Values define people. It’s not something you can change overnight. They show the things you place much significance to.

Check Out: Home Proposal Tips and Ideas: How to Get Your S.O to Say Yes!’

 6.If you Trust Yourself Around Your Partner

Getting ready for marriage in a dream is easy as everything feels smooth, but before accepting to get married, ask yourself if you feel safe around your partner. This is like a situation where a friend brings life to the party, but everyone feels the void when they leave, and the event gets dull. If you’re considering getting married, you must address topics like whether you trust the person to give you what you need to feel loved and at peace.

You must have already touched on topics that could shake the stability of the relationship. If it feels necessary to hide your true self because you fear your partner would never accept or love you for that, then it could be you’re not dating the right person. Marriage is a long-term investment, and nobody deserves to suffer in silence or suppress some aspects about themselves.

7. You Overcome Conflict Together

Is anyone ever ready for marriage until they go through conflict with their partner? This comes as a learning moment where you get to understand how it feels to deal with conflict and moments of high pressure. Marriage is not always lovey-dovey as you will encounter moments where you will split apart for some time.

Forgiveness is one of the main dimensions of a stable marriage, so when you experience this while still dating, it could signify you can live together for many years to come. Couples must learn conflict resolution before entering into a marriage. Handling conflict successfully brings marital satisfaction.

ALSO, READ 12 Steps to Increase Your Self-Esteem

8.You Have Realistic Expectations

You’ll not find a perfect human if that’s what you want for marriage. If you have lived with your partner for some time, you might be aware of this. So, before getting married, understand that besides many happy times, you will encounter sad moments. It’s common to see people expect the perfect type of love they read in all the fairies, but this is unrealistic as you’re dealing with a real human being. Check the lingering doubts of marrying the person to understand the trade-offs. 

9.You’re Inspired to Succeed

Sometimes, it’s easy to feel you’ve found the perfect person, so all you need is to relax and enjoy life. However, feeling settled and not aiming to improve is something you should be aware of. Having the inspiration to reach greater heights comes from an inner calling. It means just because you finally found your true love; it should not mean you should neglect other things, like your job, purpose, or mental and physical health. These are things that should stay with you even after marriage. You should not let the relationship make you forget about your ability to stay hungry for success.

10.You Support Each Other’s Hobbies

If you never fancied fly fishing, but this is something your partner enjoys, you should support their passion and try learning a bit about it. You will discover many interesting things and probably also find happiness doing those things.

Conclusion

Marriage marks an important transition in one’s life, so it must be approached carefully as you expect to spend your life with your partner.  Finding the right person for marriage is not enough as you also need to evaluate yourself to know if you’re ready for marriage. Consider these things before you get married to improve your chances of success.

How do you handle conflicts in your relationship? Leave a comment below. 

Jade is a finance analyst and has been involved in many successful business projects with a range of companies throughout the country. She started writing 3 years ago and enjoys researching, discussing, and writing on the topics of finances, budgeting, money advice, lifestyle, and wellness. Jade loves to spend time with her family and has many hobbies, including hiking, riding a bike, cooking, and traveling.

ALSO, READ HOW TO FALL IN LOVE WITH YOURSELF

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Marriage & Divorce

Why You Must Hire A Divorce Attorney

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Why You Must Hire A Divorce Attorney

 

Going through a divorce without legal help is like committing financial suicide. You might be thinking of going through your divorce on your own
and just using information that you can research online but that can do more harm than good. Though a DIY divorce may apply to certain situations,
it is still smarter to hire a divorce attorney to ensure that your best interests are taken into consideration. Keep reading for reasons why hiring a divorce
attorney could be one of your best divorce decisions.

You Want to Eliminate Mistakes

“The legal system is complicated enough to navigate for those who have a legal degree, so navigating it from a layman’s perspective is like trying to pilot a plane without even knowing how to ride a bike”, says Michael Porter of Haywood Hunt & Associates Inc.

Legal jargon can be very challenging. It can take just one word for you to completely misunderstand something (like a debt or medical issue) or overestimate/underestimate the value of an asset. This is the last thing you want. Why? Because mistakes like this can cause your financial ruin or may need to be corrected with more legal proceedings in the future. An attorney can ensure that your case is being handled properly and that you will not be making decisions that you will regret for years to come.

You Will Benefit from Legal Advice

A divorce attorney can ensure that you get what you deserve during a divorce. This is important because state laws do not always support an even split of a couple’s assets. There are cases where a spouse is entitled to a spouse’s future income and/or retirement. By hiring an attorney, you ensure that complicated issues such as debts, child custody, current assets, future assets, and child support are legally addressed.

You Want to Minimize Stress

Divorce is a highly stressful time. Not only will it be addressing the end of your marriage, but might also bring up painful experiences from the past. A divorce attorney will provide objective help in gathering information, presenting information, and representing your interests. This will give you more time to process your feelings and take care of yourself and your family.

Keep in mind that a divorce will be a very painful time and the last thing youneed is to have to take on legal work. That is what an attorney is for.

You Don’t Want Delays

Completing all the paperwork needed for a divorce plus gathering information and documenting everything isn’t an easy task. Yes, there are court provided documents but that is just a small percentage of what you actually need. Aside from paperwork, there are other legal issues that can prolong a divorce or halt the progress into a crawl. An experienced divorce attorney knows how to avoid problems like the above and get things done as fast as possible.

You Want A Clear Divorce

A divorce is a legal agreement and is legally binding. You want everything in your divorce to be as clear as possible and that each point that needs to be
addressed are taken care of. A divorce attorney will ensure that your wishes are accurately presented and that you understand everything that goes into
the divorce. This way, the divorce would be free from unclear language or errors.

ALSO, READ TOP 5 MONEY ISSUES THAT COULD  DESTROY YOUR RELATIONSHIP

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