Relationships are nice and there are a lot of things expected from both parties, a lot of things to also consider. But in relationships, there are ups and downs, and before becoming a happy couple there are rough edges. Edges like trying to help your emotionally unavailable partner.
There are two basic facts to a relationship, which are True Friendship and Good communication. With both facts involved, there shouldn’t be any problems. But what happens if he is emotionally unavailable.
Who is an Emotionally Unavailable Man?
Being emotionally unavailable describes someone who is not open to discussing or sharing their feelings. They can be evasive, flaky, or hard to read. “They’re scared of intimacy,” explains licensed couples therapist Brooke Sprowl, LCSW, CNTS.
Being emotionally unavailable may be caused by past experiences, making the person go into a shell with what he creates for himself. This may happen to anyone.
So how do you know he’s emotionally unavailable?…..
Remember that in a relationship both parties are involved, and I’m pretty sure you tapped this link because you may have seen some signs and you are trying to help that partner of yours….Good luck!
How do you know your partner is emotionally unavailable?
Emotionally unavailable partners may be evasive, make excuses, or be unable to talk about their feelings. More subtle signs that may signal unavailability include being too flattering, chronic lateness, and arrogance. It’s also important, to be honest with yourself about your own emotional availability.
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Symptoms of emotional detachment
1. Difficulty creating or maintaining personal relationships: This person would always want to be in that shell that he has created for himself and try as much as possible not to let anyone in. This may involve a lot of mood swings. He may love you and may not know how to show it
2. A lack of attention, or appearing preoccupied when around others: They are more introverted than usual especially when they are around people. Some of them may hate humans generally and talk during a social gathering is way out of their comfort zone. So they prefer to keep to themselves.
3. Difficulty being loving or affectionate with a family member: Like earlier stated, they may love you but not know how to show it. It may look like love doesn’t dwell in them…..it does! They don’t just know how to show it. For them, it’s very hard.
4. Avoiding people, activities, or places because they’re associated with past trauma or event: Past experiences do have a way to stick to people’s minds, especially if it’s a negative one. If anything relating to whatever traumatized them happens they completely lose it. So they find every means possible to avoid it.
Helping such a person might look difficult, but it’s not difficult at all, it just takes time. Just a little complex because of the mood swings involved, but looking at it, it’s not hard at all.
So how can you help such a person? How can you bring him out of that shell
How to Deal With An Emotionally Unavailable Man
Dealing with the emotions of someone you really care about must require your very own deity. Praying for that person to whatever religion you believe in. Pray to God, Allah, Buddha, whatever, or whoever it is. That way you’re halfway through.
2: Lower your expectations, just a little bit
Don’t expect too much from him, just take little gestures as one of the biggest things he’s doing for you. That way he’d want to do more. Instead of being extremely introverted, he might just come out as simply shy but a tiny bit extroverted. That’s your first improvement!
3:Try to figure out the best way to get through to him
Every human being on earth has something that they can never let go of, no matter how much he tries to hide it. It may be a hobby or something he really likes to do or say. That is the easiest way to get through to him.
4:Find a good friend to confide in
This doesn’t mean you’re bringing a third party into the relationship, it’s just you trying to not do things on your own. Most times this is not always advisable but very effective!
5:Consider couples counseling
Couples counseling helps both parties air their views, it’s also a safe place for peaceful talk. Helping an emotionally unavailable man needs the best environment.
6: Have patience
Patience is a very good virtue. Sometimes it gets frustrating, sometimes you might feel like you can’t keep up, or you feel like you’ve done something wrong. Take a chill pill and trust the process. Let time do its work. Be patient. It’ll go a really long way.
7: Read his body language
When having a conversation, there is every probability that he might have a mood swing, Or he may not be comfortable with what you’re saying. Call him out calmly, words like “we don’t have to talk about it if you’re not okay with it” It sends a signal of comfort. It works every time.
8: Be true to what you want
Never try to beat around the bush, go straight to the point. Whatever you want you to have to work towards it. Don’t ever try to go around it. It never works
9:Focus on the positive
Work with the improvements and never be negative about it. Be genuinely happy that your partner is coming out of that shell. Stay positive, stay happy and stay calm with the improvements.
An Emotionally Unavailable Man is someone who is basically in a shell he has created to find solace in. For him it’s a comfort zone and trying to bring him out of it might be one of the hardest things, but trust me it’s worth it.
Through this process, you’d find out that the bond the both of you once shared becomes stronger and unbreakable.
You can have that happy relationship you’ve always wanted. Although helping an emotionally unavailable man is like helping an addicted man, but who says no one can overcome an addiction. You just have to take the right steps
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