In this article, we would be dealing with the top money issues that could destroy your relationship or even marriage. In this 21st century, money is one of the major issues in relationships. If these issues are not resolved amicably, they can end a relationship.
The money they say, is the root of all evil. Money is something you can’t do without. Another thing about money is that you can’t buy happiness with money. Money is also one of the major causes of divorce in marriage.
A relationship involves way more than sharing love, sex, pain, success, and many more. In a relationship, finance is very important because when you marry your partner, it automatically becomes a lifetime financial partnership. One of the best ways to be free from the storms incurred through money is to avoid these 7 things.
1.Debt: Debt refers to money owed. A borrower they say is a slave to the lender. One bad thing about debt is that it can change from one form to another. One may borrow to buy a car but may use the money for gambling.
Gambling is one thing that many people have had high expectations for. I remembered having a friend who was addicted to gambling. When he gambles, He would always calculate is expected earnings and start making plans for it even when he has not seen the money. After planning, when the gamble fails, he ends up disappointed, frustrated, and indebted.
Even While owing huge sums of money, he still borrows more, hoping to get more money to pay back all the debts incurred. An adage says “Never spend your money before you have it.”
One of the most dangerous things to do before marriage is being in debt (esp. as a Man) or borrowing money to marry. This has more effect on men than women because they have more responsibility
If both partners are debt-free, things will move smoothly. Many couples have changed their standard of living due to the bondage of debts. Debts can make you go from being a HERO to ZERO.
Run from debt!!!! It is one of the top money issues that could destroy your relationship
2.Financial Infidelity/Dishonesty: Infidelity is not just about cheating or having a sexual relationship outside your marriage. Infidelity may also be in financial form.
A financial infidelity is an act of making financial decisions and using money personally without the knowledge of your partner. This may involve borrowing or lending money, spending extravagantly, having secret bank accounts, and not being honest about your earnings.
These are decisions usually taken by a partner for selfish reasons probably to offset debts but this in return brings financial set back to the couple.
Financial status is something that most people do not disclose instead they tell lies. It is a potential relationship killer especially when one finds out that the partner is hiding something from them. They may get devastated, angry, and hopeless. Research has shown that 7 out of 10 persons in a relationship are financially dishonest.
Partners should desist from it. Some examples of financial infidelity include:
Example1: If a lady buys expensive jewelry and hides the original amount from the partner.
Honey? I got this gold for $500 dollars. (Meanwhile the actual price is $2000).
Example2: A man buying his girlfriend a car yet complains to his wife that he has no money.
Example3: Having assets such as houses, buildings, cars, and businesses without letting your partner know.
Partners should discuss their finances before and after marriage. If any issue arises, they should settle it amicably.
3.Being Too Controlling and Judgmental: Money is a very powerful tool used in solving problems.
It is fine to set spending limits in your relationship but do not do it in an authoritative and annoying manner. Agree with your partner. Your partner may want to spend or purchase something according to his/her will but because of your attitude she wouldn’t want to do it. However, not being judgmental or authoritative does not mean you should spend irresponsibly.
There might be situation when one partner is employed and the other is unemployed; or where one earns more that the other. If care is not taken it could lead to one partner controlling another. Sometimes one might come from a wealthier background than the other. This should not be an avenue for you to be judgmental or controlling.
- Having Many Children: Having plenty of children is not advisable. Raising a child costs so much money. Having multiple children may ruin your finances.
There are Several Expenses for Raising kids such as clothing, feeding, school fees, prom gowns, designer jeans, and many more.
The cost of raising a child to age 18 in the United States is about $233,610
5.Extended Family and In-law: The idea of taking care of your extended family may ruin your finances. Examples of issues that may arise include:
- Your wife’s mom requesting money to start a business.
- When the wife’s family needs money for a building project
- Your siblings requesting money for school fees
- Peradventure your in-laws are looking for money to pay rent.
- When your extended family needs support.
- Not Talking About Your Finances Regularly: It is paramount to talk about your expenses, and your financial life regularly. Not doing so would make you look secretive.
When you get a promotion, Say it!
When things go bad say it too.
Don’t ever keep issues relating to finances a secret. It may ruin your relationship.
7. Failure to set joint financial goals: Setting financial goals should be adopted in a relationship. It would help in planning your future. In this case, you guys might want to get a joint account and plan things together.
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