What does it mean to be Bisexual?
To be bisexual means you’re attracted to people of more than one sex or same-sex. A person who’s bisexual can have an intimate relationship with both genders at the same time.
Bisexuality is usually celebrated on the 23rd of September annually by bisexual people, (both men and women).
Surviving with a husband who’s bisexual is not easy especially when you don’t know about it before getting married to him. People keep a lot of secrets even in marriage. There are women who can’t cope with a bisexual being. They may choose to file a divorce after discovering it.
At the same time, trying to make your marriage stand the test of time should be one of your utmost priorities. Marriage comes with so many challenges whether bisexual or not.
~Marriage is like a mystery box that comes with a lot of surprises. But that doesn’t mean, we take them like that without finding the solutions.
Finding that your man is bisexual may be very disgusting, and you might feel threatened by it. Many will ask questions like, is my husband going to leave me? Does he like men more than he likes women? You might be going crazy because of these thoughts.
Research has shown that,
• We have more bisexual women than men. It’s very difficult to see a man who’s comfier “dating a man and a woman at the same time” than a woman.
• It is easier for women to leave lesbianism than a gay who’s bisexual.
Although, learning that your hubby is a bisexual can shake the foundation of your marriage but doesn’t mean it’ll collapse. Some people feel that having a bisexual partner will make their sex life more satisfying.
No need to worry too much that a man is going to replace you, here, you’ll see the ways to cope with a bisexual husband.
WHAT TO DO WHEN YOU FIND OUT THAT HE IS BISEXUAL
1.Take a Step back and relax
This is the first thing done when you find out he’s a bisexual. Over 90% of men will never tell you that they are bisexual till you find it out by yourself. Knowing the whole truth can be overwhelming. It may or may not hurt your marriage.
First, you’ll need to calm your nerves down and think straight. You’d be asking yourself questions like:
Can my marriage survive?
My husband is bisexual, what should I do?
How do I live with a bisexual husband?
This shouldn’t be the time to complain about what you discovered. Complaining or yelling about the whole matter might make you lose your marriage completely; the whole goal here is to adapt, change him and live a happy life.
If he’s the one that actually opened up to you, then it means he really needs your help to probably stop him.
2. Talk to Him
The first thing to do when you find out that your husband is bisexual is to talk to him. Don’t ever think of leaving the subject matter behind. In this case here, you are acting as a counselor. It is your duty to know when he started it, why he loves it and why he’s not ready to stop. When you’re talking with him, never make him feel bad for being bisexual or criticize him for being different because when you do, he’ll never be honest with you.
His being bisexual is a part of his identity; never you express any negative vibes around.
3. Give support
When you find out that your husband is bisexual, the best thing for you to do is to give him support. Accept him for who he is, before you know about him being bisexual, he used to be the no1 man in your life. Bisexual is just another part of his life you just discovered.
Love and caring should be your daily duties by doing this, it will make him feel more special.
4. Learn about Bisexuality
Learning about Bisexuality can be a great way for your marriage to survive. One thing about bisexuality is that the person is sexually attracted to love two genders and with less attention to specific genders.
I’ll be sharing some myths about bisexuality, if you don’t know them it can ruin your marriage.
• Myth1: Bisexuals are prone to have more sexually transmitted diseases.
• Myth2: Bisexuals can’t be faithful
It is very clear that “Bi” involves two persons, it’s so rare to see a faithful spouse who’s bisexual.
• Myth3: A person is either gay or straight. Not both
It’s either he/she is heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, asexual, pansexual, or sociosexual.
5. Start Afresh
When you’ve discovered the man you’ve married to, is now a bisexual, it’s an automatic new phase for both couples. Although he’s still the same person, now you know some of his cravings and feelings. You’ll need to start with new boundaries and expectations to succeed.
6. Be open to each other
One way for your marriage to survive if you have a bisexual husband is to be open to each other. For your marriage to work, there must be transparency between the man and the woman.
When you’re open to him, he’ll do the same then you can use those things he tells you to help him manage his bisexuality.
7. Make sure other areas of your life are fun and interesting.
Getting over the shock and trauma may not be easy. Find hobbies and other activities to do with your partner, this will help you adapt to him being bisexual.
8. Visit an LGBT(Lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender) center for support: An LGBT center is a place where you can get health information and also get counseling.
* You can do well to Visit and local LGBT center or visit their website via. The community of LGBT Centers.
9. Talk with a trusted family member or a friend:
yes! Matters pertaining to marriages should be private, yes we know. But sometimes talking to an experienced and a trusted friend or a family member will help you get someone else’s perspective on things. And it can be a gateway to help you survive if you have a bisexual husband.
10. Find out what God’s words are in this situation.
Anything, we do outside without God is very difficult to accomplish. The only solution here is to know what the word of God says in this situation. Talk to your pastor or your priest in church. And this time, you need to pray over it. Let the Holy Spirit take control of this situation, and have faith in God.
He sees the universe, and only him can take away all this sorrow.
ALSO, READ 7 TIPS ON HOW TO BREAK-UP A RELATIONSHIP