Have you ever dated or currently dating someone with depression? Depression is a demoralizing experience. No one ever wishes to be depressed, situations of life can put one in such a state and it takes time and sometimes a psychologist or therapist to talk them out of their mood. Most times a depressed person has to undergo therapy to facilitate the treatment.
Dating someone in depression is very frustrating, it takes true love and understanding to actually date someone in such a state. Depression weakens people emotionally and it takes time to get out of it.
Depression can affect a relationship in all aspects. Depression is a state of unhappiness or low morale that leads to sadness and makes you feel inferior. Depression kills your feelings and keeps you off track. A depressed person is always emotionally unstable, nothing entices them and they are difficult to please. Dealing with a depressed person involves a lot, you need to be patient and show them all the love you can give. Make them feel important and let them earn your trust, if they trust you then they can easily communicate with you.
Proven Tips On How To Date Someone That Is Depressed
1. Find Acceptance
Finding acceptance is a key thing for a depressed person. Once you accept them for who they are irrespective of their depressed state, it makes them comfortable and feels wanted. If you really want to be with a depressed person, you must be able to appreciate them, never criticize or shame them even if what they are doing is wrong. Rather correct them with love.
2. Don’t Try To Mend Them
Trying to mend a depressed person is the wrong approach to handling them. They are not totally broken, depression is a mental disturbance or malfunction. They don’t need you to fix them, they only need your support and love.
If you are trying to fix their life they will get bored and will feel you do not accept them for who they are.
3. Set Boundaries
Dating a depressed person can be very tough. Irrespective of the fact that you want to make them feel loved, you should set boundaries. Your life shouldn’t revolve around them. For instance, if there’s something you want to do and your partner is not disposed of for it, you should go ahead not minding their refusal.
A depressed can be aggressive sometimes and most times they are unconscious of their actions. But this doesn’t mean you should tolerate their attitude if it’s abusive, it’s best you work away to save yourself.
4. Listen To Them
Listening to them will make a great deal. If they are willing to share their problems with you listen and let them know you will always be there for them. Since you can’t actually solve their problem, this is the least you can do for them. Ask them how they are feeling from time to time. Don’t try to correct them or blame them, just make them feel relaxed.
5. Encourage Them To See a Therapist
Visiting a therapist is very important for a depressed person. Therapy can help them solve their problem. If they wish to see a therapist go with them.If they aren’t seeing any suggest to them to book a session even if it’s online. But don’t pressure them to see a therapist.
6. Consecrate On Their Strength
This is applicable to all relationships. It’s wrong to always point out someone’s fault or errors, learn to focus on your partner’s strength. It’s difficult dealing with people but is much harder with a depressed person.
When you focus on their strength, they tend to gain more confidence, this can also be a source of therapy for them too.
7. Don’t Make Them Feel Vad
Depression comes with guilt, no one ever wants to hurt the one they love. They feel bad when you are hurt and it also adds to their depression. let them know you understand what they are going through and you are ready to be with them.
8. Try To Discover What Triggers The Depression
Try to find out the cause of their depression, it will help you relate with them easily. Observe their reactions when you speak or when something occurs, this will enable you to avoid what triggers their depression.
9. Be compassionate
Showing compassion is important for them too. if you are dating a depressed person. Be nice and cool with them. Let them feel your empathy, it goes a long way to eliminate resentment and the pains they feel from their mood.
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10. Avoid venomous positivity
It’s actually wrong to give someone the wrong idea of their problem. Even if you wish to stay positive but don’t give them toxic positive believe that will worsen the situation.
11. Communicate honestly
Honest communication means alot to anyone, especially to a depressed person. It shows your level of honesty and sincerity. The least conversation a depressed person would want to engage in is one that is filled with lies and fabricated stories. Let them see the truth in what you are saying.
12. Help them Discover Their Purpose
Discovering one’s purpose is important for every individual. It might take some people alot to eventually discover their purpose, for a depressed person is more difficult. As a partner to someone that is depressed you, need to help them discover what they are good at and their purpose in life.
Also, be supportive in helping them to achieve their dreams and let them know their depression symptoms can’t hinder them.
13. Don’t be Afraid To Ask Difficult Questions
Speaking with someone in a depressed state can be quite challenging, one might be scared of asking some questions that might seem difficult or weird to them. Irrespective of their condition, never be scared to ask them any question no matter how hard it might be. Still relate it to them as you would to other people.
14. Always Encourage Them
Encouragement is one of the best support you can give to a depressed person. Give them hope and let them know all will be well with them. Don’t put it to them that they are suffering from depression, encourage them even in their worst mood.
15. Take Care Of Yourself
Even as much as you should take care of them, don’t forget to take care of yourself. If you neglect yourself, you might end up becoming depressed too. So don’t let the situation get to you, be relaxed and stay fit because they need you to be strong for them.
16. It’s Totally Fine To Call Off The Relationship
It’s really a great task to date and take care of a depressed person. So, if you feel it’s getting on you and you don’t feel them anymore, Or probably you are tired of tolerating him/her then it’s fine to break up. It is better to end it than pretending all is well when it’s not.
Depression comes with alot of symptoms. One of the predominant symptoms is sadness. If you are the partner that finds it difficult to smile or stay happy, it will really affect you both. Try to be more relaxed around them, talk to them but don’t take the role of a therapist. Set your boundaries right and respect their decision.
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How To Get The Love Of Your Life Back Without Stress
How to get back the love of your life is not the issue. Actually, the issue arises from not knowing the root cause.
Have you parted ways and you miss them? Do you really want the love of your life back?
You must understand that Breakups happen for various reasons. Knowing the cause is one of the steps in getting them back.
But, the fact that you are on this page right now trying to get a better understanding of the situation is in itself the very first step. You already know there is an issue and you are willing to do something about it. Acknowledging you have lost them and making efforts to get them back is really a commendable feat. So here are a few tips to assist you
1. Know What Problems You Have??
As mentioned earlier, knowing there is a problem is a vital step to problem-solving. Thus, the understanding that you have lost someone and you need to get them back is just what you need.
Understanding the root cause of your issue, that is, the reason you lost them in the first place will help you proffer solutions in getting them back.
Here are nine questions you could ask yourself in this case
- What went wrong?
- Where did you go wrong?
- What are the possible causes?
- .Was the cause directly from you?
- At what point did you start losing them?
- Were your actions intentional?
- How do they currently perceive you?
- How important are they to you?
- Just how far can you go to reconcile with them or how far will you go to get them back?
These questions are important to help you pilot your mind on getting them back. You may just get up and reconcile with them and get them back but the same issue may arise later if you do not understand and address the problems properly now.
Let’s say, it was an attitude of yours like possessiveness that made your partner leave, then you must address and consciously make effort to change that behavior. If they must come back, your loved one deserves a better you.
You may tell them that you will change but as we all know, actions speak louder than the best of words. It may be hard convincing them to come back by just telling them you will change. However, if they perceive that you have changed then the whole process is easier.
It’s understandable if you feel desperate and emotional but before going to them, be sure of what you want, work on your faults, forgive yourself first and forgive them. Next is to move forward with a better attitude, taking each growth once at a time. Make sure you are not going back just because you feel lonely.
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2. Give Them Space
This may not sound correct but yes! Give them space to get them back. When you let go of someone no matter how hard it was for you, that is when you can get them to come back again.
Why should you give the person you are trying to win backspace? Simply because you already lost them so give them space! Stop being clingy! Let them breathe!
Eventually, when you start working towards getting them back, they won’t even see it because you didn’t give them enough space to see the change in you.
To all extent, absence makes the heart grow fonder; if both of you are no longer in a relationship, then you may not even be in contact anymore. Giving the love of your life some space also makes them miss you and all the things you did together
So, take a bold step forward and truly separate yourself from them. This space helps you properly observe the relationship from an external point of view and actually see what went wrong. This way you can figure out what truly caused the breakup and even things you could have done to avoid it.
3. Improve Your Image
The reason why you must improve your image in your relationship is that things are easier said than done. Instead of wallowing in grief in one corner, you could as well start working on becoming a better version of yourself.
The previous point states you give your partner some space but this is actually not very easy if you are not busy with something healthy taking your attention away from the relationship.
Also, you really do not want them coming back to the same you but an upgraded version of yourself. Examples of what you can do to improve your image includes
- Cultivating a new habit (positive habit)
- Work out. Do some exercise on a regular basis
- Work on your looks
- Upgrade your style and dress sense
- Take into account what they always complained about and work on
4. Reconnect On Shared Interests
This is the action step. It’s here all your hard work comes to light. You have understood the reasons for the breakup, you’ve known the problems you have, you have given them space, you have improved your image and worked on yourself, thus, it is time to reconnect.
You don’t expect them to come back on their own, do you? Instead of waiting for them to see the changes and come back on their own accord, you should shower them with love and care. This doesn’t translate to pestering them though. You cannot afford to take this step lightly. This is because as sad as it sounds, this person may have moved on.
You have to be ready to accept what comes after now. But you cannot deprive yourself of your opportunity to give it a try.
6 Ways You Can Reconnect With The Love Of Your Life Includes The Following.
- Because you know this person, you should know what works when it comes to communication
- Test the waters. Don’t just jump into an “I want you back”
Start with an “it’s been a while, how are you?” then proceed to “what up with you these days” and the “I’m sorry for what happened with us” then proceed with an “I miss you so much, I find it impossible to replace you” and then you end with an “I wish for us to be together, how about we do this again and do it better this time”
If you check well with the sequence of the above statement, you will see the pattern followed.
- You both should try new things together. This brings a breath of fresh air to the relationship and helps both of you remember why you fell in love initially.
- Strike a balance and don’t settle for where you are. Don’t get comfortable with your current level of growth. Strive to grow daily and work on getting better for your lover.
- Keep things real. Let them know you are growing are willing to be more. Don’t pretend to be who you are not. If pretense comes to play here, you will definitely have more issues later as time progresses.
- Spend time with each other. This reconnecting phase requires attention especially if your partner’s love language is attention; you should give a lot of it.
- Communicate effectively. Communication is key; so, you must keep it active. Always be in contact with him/her in this phase
- Go out with friends. Engage friends, especially those who were involved in your initial relationship. Go on group dates and trips
Relationship seeds will like to wish you success in getting the love of your life back. Also, know that what is meant to be will be. So, even if you faced rejection as painful as it can be, look on the brighter side, Work on yourself and live on. Just do the needful and the right person will definitely come along.
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5 Best Ways to Attract a Russian Guy
Chivalry is very rare in this modern era. Any woman today has had experienced being catcalled or yelled “nice behind” almost anywhere they go. To say that it has become sad is an enormous understatement.
However, this isn’t the case in Russia. Men in Russia are still as courteous as ever. Offering one’s seat in a public transportation system or even opening a door didn’t die with time.
Russian men will be a perfect fit if you wish to end up with a real gentleman. If you want to make them fall for you, below are the surefire ways to attract a Russian guy.
Shared Qualities of Men in Russia
But first, let’s talk about some qualities Russian men share and the values they still regard even in this modern time.
Men in Russia have always had a strong respect for women and the elderly. They show concern to them and assist them with whatever they need. Gestures like opening the door or helping get down a bus are seemingly simple acts in Russia but are grand for most Westerners.
While others misconstrue this attitude of Russian men as an act of sexism, they think otherwise. Men’s courteousness towards women and the elderly results from their concern and kindness — nothing else. This attitude of Russian guys is easily traceable to the way men in the past treated ladies.
Unlike before, Russian men are more sensitive to women’s choices and opinions. They now listen to women’s voices. The technological advances or modernity of the world didn’t affect their perception of chivalry.
2. Protective and confident
Russian guys are innately protective because of their sad history. They carried this quality until today because their women counterparts still expect them to be their protectors.
Russian women also need them to take the lead in the relationship. They want to end up with a confident man who can make them feel safe and make sound decisions for the family.
Russian men like to think about things beyond the grasp of understanding. While Western men like making casual talks to strangers in public, Russian guys don’t.Men in Russia do not see the value in casual talk as they prefer to talk about real-life matters. They like to dive into meaningful conversations.
5 Best Ways to Attract a Russian Guy
Now that we have that figured out, let us go ahead and talk about the compelling ways to make a Russian guy fall for you.
1. Learn how to cook
They say the surest way to a man’s heart is through his stomach.
The saying is true, at least for Russian guys. Russian men’s idea of love is when their partner serves them dinner. While this may hurt any feminist’s pride, this is an undeniable truth for most Russians.
Men in the country love a woman who will prepare their favorite food, even when it isn’t tasty. However, if this isn’t your love language, perhaps a guy in Russia isn’t for you.
2. Be feminine
Women from other countries want to do things their way — and there isn’t anything wrong with that. But, Russian men prefer to take the lead in a relationship. They like a woman who will trust that they can protect them, in general.
As such, to attract your Russian date, assure them that you need them in your life. Let them know that you feel safe when they are around.
3. Challenge him
Russian guys may like to be the more assertive ones in the relationship, but it doesn’t mean they always win. This is often something they look for in a partner — someone who’ll spice up the conversation or challenge them now and again.
Men in the country are highly opinionated people, and they would love for a woman to speak their minds. Telling him off when he’s aggressive or poking fun at him can also help lower his ego.
4. Laugh at his jokes
Russian men generally love a good laugh. Throwing out funny punchlines at friends at social gatherings is innate for them. It is a typical scene at any party, and for them, it’s an excellent way to strengthen any relationship.
So, show your amusement when your Russian date throws a joke. But beware — a Russian guy’s humor may be a little dark. They often throw jokes about death.
If you wish your laugh to be more genuine, study your Russian date’s culture and history. Often, your date’s jokes may also be about Russian movies or political scenarios.
5. Love his family
Anyone that understands Russia knows how much they value family. They are the most important thing for most locals in the country.
As your date, nothing will make a Russian guy appreciate you and your presence if they see you bond with his family. He’ll love your effort even more if you respect his family, even when they are hostile towards you — in case they are.
Cherish your interethnic relationship!
To find a loving and courteous man in today’s era has become more of a challenge.
Since you already know about Russian men, be sure not to settle for anything less. Look for your modern Ivan Tsarevich and wait patiently in the process. Once you finally find him, cherish him deeply.
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How to Make A Man Chase You (13 Strategic Ways)
Sometimes we get attracted to the opposite sex, and we even want to ask them out ourselves because of the level of attraction.Some bold ladies will do that why others won’t. You might feel awkward going to approach a guy, but the truth is you can’t even control your emotions.
You like a guy so much and you are wondering how you can get this guy to notice you and chase you. Right in this article, I will show you simple but strategic skills on how you can get a guy to chase you without letting yourself down or feeling desperate.
13 Strategic ways to make a guy chase you
1. Be a woman of substance
Men love women of strong will, and of great value. They are attracted to beautiful women but they are glued to independent women that can stand on their own. They can’t resist hardworking and intelligent women, this category of women are valuable.
The fact is that men actually go for what will benefit them. They go for women that know what they want that is straightforward with their values. If you want him to chase you become the best version of yourself.
2. Keep your emotions intact
Don’t let your emotions overwhelm you. Be in control of your emotions, don’t make it too obvious that you love him that much. Men seem to take advantage of what they have when it’s too available.
Sometimes, you might feel the urge to give in easily, perhaps, you are getting old and time is not on your side. Just be calm and take your time to study him, it’s worth the wait no matter how long it takes.
3. Stop chasing him
Let him do the chase. Even when you feel so overwhelmed, your emotions might be too high and you feel you want to explode. It’s normal but don’t push him too hard. Let him do the chasing that way he will value you. Men value what they work hard for, if they get you easily, they will take you for granted.
4. Encourage and boost him
Try to encourage him and boost his confidence. There might be times when he is down or going through some tough moment. Try to encourage him and let him know you will stand by him even in difficult times.
Your actions and care towards him when he’s down shows you are not scared of challenges and that you really care and you will always be with him.
5. Give him space
If you want a guy to chase you. Give some space and you will see how he will come running to you. Practice this, it works on men. When you are too available he will distance himself from you. Just be on a low, when you stay away for some time he will begin to miss you. Once this feeling comes, he will definitely come for you. This is a proven strategy to make a guy chase you.
6. Flirt with him
You shouldn’t allow him to do the chase alone. Flirt around him too, you could try some romantic body language just to get his attention and make him chase you.
A little flirt won’t do any harm, you can flirt with your eyes, texting, or calling. Men also love it when you flirt around them, it shows that you are also interested in him.
7. Don’t be scared to walkout
Even if this guy doesn’t respond positively, don’t be scared to work away. Not every guy you are interested in will be attracted to you.
If he is not into you, don’t be so worked out because he didn’t respond or force yourself on him. Keep your self-worth and respect, take a walk and look elsewhere.
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8. Make him feel you care too
Be nice and care for him too. If you really want him to come after you, then showing him little care and attention is a good start. let him know you care about him enough for him to chase you.
He can only take the risk to chase you if he notices your care and concern for him. You can only go for someone that wants you not the other way round.
9. Become a treat to his eyes
Physical looks also create a good impression. You don’t expect him to go for a lady who can’t take care of her looks. Take your time to appear beautiful and nice. You must not look stunning, but be clean, classy, and presentable.
If you want him to chase you then you have to put your looks into consideration. This guy would want you to appear beautiful in his eyes and also for others. That way he would be geared to woo you.
10. Seduce him cleverly
Another good skill to apply to make a man chase you is seducing him. This should be done cleverly. You don’t want him to look down on you, or see you as a desperate woman. Seduce him like the smart lady that you are. Your seduction will get him on and he will be head-on heels in love with you.
11. Be real
Pretense will ruin your plan. Leaving a fake life just to impress him is actually a waste. What do you think will be his reaction when he finds out. Be real and come out plain. Let him see the real you, that way he will appreciate you.
Leaving a shadow life will only complicate issues when he eventually finds out. So don’t be boastful or proud, be free and be yourself.
12. Show confidence to make him chase you
Confidence boost courage. It tells who you are and shows you are not afraid to face what you are confidence is a very good trait every woman should possess. Every guy gets stormed by a woman with confidence, it’s like an attractive force that gets them hooked to women.
You are confident doesn’t mean you are proud all you are too full of yourself. It spells out your strength, self-esteem, and worth. The moment he storms into that room, he feels your confidence and the strength in you.
13. Stay busy
Don’t hang around, waiting for him to come and woo you. Keep yourself busy, get a job, hang out with your friends. let him see the other part of your active life. If he sees you are busy it shows you are useful and you are worth fighting for.
Men hate lazy women, don’t fold your hands waiting for a man to chase you and get you busy. Have a life aside relationship, build your career.
Having a man chase you is great but let him be worth your attention. So if you really want him that much apply these strategies and you will get him to chase you without feeling desperate.
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