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HOW TO GET A WOMAN’S ATTENTION

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a girl looking up

 

Getting a woman’s attention can be quite easy and also difficult Because women can be really unpredictable and weird…There are some unique ways to get into a woman’s heart, you just need time and patience.

Most successful TV soaps, capture their audience’s attention and keep them coming back. They set up unresolved mysteries that leave you hanging, wondering what’s going to happen next. It’s a simple, but immensely powerful technique: whenever a plot thread is
resolved, another one has already been set up which will keep you, the viewer, tuning in for every new episode.

It gets you hooked. You can use this technique in your own life, too for talking to women. Once you learn what gets a woman’s attention, you’re likely to keep her engaged all the way until you resolve it, and in the meantime, you get
to do (almost) whatever you want.

In this article, I will take you through some mysteries in getting her attention.
Using the word “ATTENTION” as an acronym we will look at some of the key attracting tools to plug into a woman’s heart.

1.⭐ ATTITUDE
There is a saying that first impression matters. Your actions towards her from the start counts a whole lot, it determines if she will be attracted to you or not.

Don’t spoil your first moment with her, because that’s when you can gain access. Try to avoid rude conversation that could result in questioning, interrogation, and preying on her
Private life on your first date.

Take it slow, be calm, gentle, and accessible while talking. Look straight into her eyes and observe how she reacts to what you say and her response.keep the eye contact,
avoiding her eyes shows you are shy and it might Keep You off track, ruining the fun of the day.

Her facial expression and mood should be noted, check how she feels in each conversation, and when you change the topic, make sure she is comfortable with what you are saying or doing. Be friendly, nice, calm, and fun to be with. Your attitude should fall under the
3F’s “FANCY,”FRIENDLY, & FUNNY”.

2.⭐ TEMPTING
Appearing tempting can be really amorous, it makes You attracted to her. Your looks must be striking and lovable. That is what I call the first love attractive tool, no woman wants to be noticed, by an odd-looking fellow.

corporate dress code with style

dressing tempting to raise eyebrows

Your appearance is something that would make her gaze on you for long, it should be inspiring and charming. That look will determine, her first response and she would access and probably draw her conclusion about you.
It’s what you should not joke with. It must not be an expensive outfit, just make it smart, cool and attractive, then you see your woman all
over you.

3.⭐ TRUSTWORTHY
You must be reliable and honest. Open and truthful; this will make her fall for you over and over again and trust you.
Every woman wants a man she can count on, a man she can confide in and look up to. These attributes attract a woman. she will admire and honor you for as long as you guys are together. You can easily earn her trust, steal her heart, and keep it with you for as long as you want.
When I mean Trustworthy, I mean persistent trustworthiness, when your actions are doubtful, she’ll withdraw from you creating a gap between you too. Just be plain, straight, and responsible, avoid a corny lifestyle, nobody likes it, be on a clean slate and you will enjoy what you have with you. Never betray the trust you have built,
it might take you time to earn it back.

4.⭐ EXPRESSIBLE
Self-expression is very important, not just in professing your feelings, but in everything you want to say. Be articulate and explicit, let your speech be understandable. Your words should connote your actions, Good Communication strengthens a relationship, you comprehend and flow easily.

When expressing yourself mind your choice of words, what you say and ask. Observe her reaction and response, don’t force words into her mouth, or push words out of her mouth.If she isn’t comfortable with your Conversation, switch to another fascinating topic, it could be a story or an event. Spice it up to get her mood back, you can even crack
a joke, compliment her, tell her how beautiful she is, to make her smile and enjoy the flow.

5.⭐ NATURAL
Natural in this context, is not just your physical or external looks, local or archaic, but
here it means normal character, without artificial or pretense. Don’t be that man with a fake and exaggerated lifestyle, trust me, she won’t take you seriously. Just be yourself, no show-off!!

Believe me when I say women are more comfortable with pretty cool natural guys, who come out plain and are sincere. You might think placing yourself high will make her fall for you, my dead you are just deceiving yourself, she will only use, exploit, suck you dry and dump you before you even realize what is going on, she out of your life
for good.

A responsible lady knows what she wants, a pretentious lifestyle is not one of it. She only wants a real, genuine man who will show her love and care.
Just be yourself, let her feel, and see your real character and personality, don’t be white today and become black tomorrow. Fake life can ruin your relationship and scare her away from you.

6.⭐ THOUGHTFUL
A thoughtful man is a kind-hearted man and a considerate one. make her feel she’s one of your major priorities. This a key weapon in any relationship, You should consider her opinion
and how she feels. It must not be yours all the time.

Your sense of maturity towards her and those around her means a lot to her. Ladies are usually fond of guys who are nice and thoughtful about their affairs. Don’t make her
feel stupid, carry her along with your plans. She shouldn’t sense that you don’t care about what goes on in her life or you don’t believe in her.

To get her hooked, find out what she likes best, love to do, places she loves to have fun. know her dreams and aspirations, discover what you guys have in common and what is different about you two.

Use these as a tool to your advantage, see how you can come in, and assist her to achieve her dreams. Don’t be one of those men that discourage a woman from Pursuing her dreams. Encourage her, let her know you are with her, be sensible enough to give her the maximum support she needs from you. Never neglect or commonize her ideas, try to be accommodating, it will make her feel important, cherished, and valued and she
will be lost in your arms forever.

7.⭐ INDEPENDENT
A man must be strong, autonomous, reliable, and courageous. These qualities boost your confidence and earn you more respect. A self-standing man, a decisive man, one who can stand and defend his woman anytime she needs him.

a man on blue jean holding his jacket

Be a man of your words, you can’t be dependent on someone and expect her to look up to you and respect you. She needs someone to talk to and share her worries with, but if you can’t solve your problems, how do you expect her to believe that you can solve hers? .

Women are very sensitive, they admire strong men with wisdom and knowledge. You must
be independent in all ramifications to get her into you. That’s what will keep her,no woman wants a contingent unfocused man.

8.⭐ ORGANIZED
Another important one is organization and comportment. some men are zero in this aspect. They talk flippantly in public, eat and joke like a kid always. There is time for everything when you are out with your woman be organized and well mannered.

She wants her man to be noticed and respected in a unique way, Your life should be organized for you to be attracted and accepted. Put your life on track and be focused, before you go for a lady. The way you present yourself determines what you attract. If you are scattered your life will be scattered, your woman will also be scattered, in fact, everything around you will be scattered.

9.⭐NICE
The last mystical tool but not the least. Be nice, generous, sweet, charming, and lovely. This will always melt her heart, every woman wants to be pampered and loved.If
you can do this always, she will forever be yours and will never stop loving you. The only reason you will be welcomed is when you are nice and kind, not just to her but also to her
loved ones. Just as honey attracts flies, your kindness or niceness will always
make her attracted to you.

⭐ SOME PRACTICAL MYSTICAL STEPS THAT WORKS IN GETTING A WOMANS ATTENTION

Step 1: Set up the mystery
It can be a game with an unknown outcome, or a bet, or a piece of “exclusive” info you have about her personality, but which you’re not going to give her right away. For instance, after the interaction has started you can randomly tell her that you’ve been reading up on palm reading and tell her to show you her hands (Don’t ask her if it’s alright… just say:
“Show me your hands”).

From there, you can give out a proper palm read (it helps if you know how to do it), and finally,

when you get to the end say… “Uh oh!”
She’ll say: “What??!”
You: “Umm, I don’t think I can tell you
right now, I’ll tell you later when we know each other better”

This is a playful and fun way of really grabbing someone’s attention. Although I don’t necessarily advise people to use palm reading, the idea is to have someone, wanting to know the other part of the story.

A little warning, this will drive them crazy at first! They might not let up…
“Nooo, tell me NOW!!”Ultimately, when this happens you have to keep your frame and YOU decide when to tell them. Remember, you’ll eventually have to tell them so you better
have something that you noticed about them that you haven’t
told them yet.

As a guy, it’s your job to keep the suspense up, to lead the interaction, and to make sure that you’re both having fun. If you go out and tell them everything immediately, the tension will be lost… so stretch it out for a little. Tell them a little at the beginning
and save the rest for later. They’ll be happy you did!

Step 2: Play the game.
Now you’re on. When you really want to capture a woman’s attention, you need to make her want you to tell her things. The trick to this is to gather up pertinent pieces of information about her that you can use later on. Remember, the more you know about a woman, the more you can use this to your advantage.
That’s why it’s so important to listen when they talk! If during the conversation, she mentions that she’s from Canada… then you can say that there’s something that all Canadian girls have in common…. and then just leave it at that!
Don’t tell her right away, it will drive her crazy.

Step 3: Unveil the mystery:
Eventually, however, you’ll have to resolve the mystery that you have set up. How you resolve your stories will be up to you, but remember that when you do, you should be honest and it should feel as if it’s resolved. There’s nothing worse than wondering “what the other person is thinking” only to find out that they weren’t actually thinking anything.

You’d feel robbed and cheated, so make sure you have something when you originally delay the information! It can be a little cheesy and that works, for example when you’re reading her palm but don’t want to tell her the last one. You can tell her that you had an intense feeling that you’d be kissing later on when you read her palm… but you couldn’t tell her
when you were doing the reading. All in all, the more playful you are, the better.

Create whatever kind of tension you can! During your interactions, you usually have ample opportunity to study her body language and look at her closely. You may have found a particular piece of jewelry she wears, or a tiny scar she has, or a tattoo, or that she dyes her hair (the color of her eyebrows could give that away, or the fact that near the roots, her hair has its natural color). Use everything you notice to your advantage!

It’s your call where you go after you capture a girl’s attention. You’ve set up a powerful framework for an exciting conversation, and if you follow the same method that TV soaps do, you can set up more mysteries while previous ones are unsolved, and keep things fresh and exciting.

Mysteries can be about yourself or what you pretend to have figured out about her, but be sure to use them more sparingly as the conversation progresses:
while a mystery is a great way of getting attention, putting on a show will not help you keep it. Move on to authenticity and, ultimately, a more intimate and sexual vibe.

✔️ Create a Spark with Real Conversation:
Why? Great conversation leads to great chemistry. If I’m on a first date, and the conversation is flowing, the next thing I know, I’m staring at your mouth. You’re telling a story, but I’m wondering what it feels like to kiss you.

Women look at the way you write the first message, and start the conversation, as an indication of how well you will play the first date. This is where most guys drop the ball. They write,
“How’s your night going?” or “I’m interested in getting to know you.”
These messages don’t make a good first impression because they don’t prove that a guy has read a girl’s profile. We’ll think he only looked at our pictures before messaging us.

How: Smart guys jump right into a conversation with confidence.
They don’t worry about “testing the waters” – they just drop a line
with some really good bait. The best bait is asking a simple question about something that’s important to the girl: her hobbies, unusual interests, favorite things, etc. What stands out to you as interesting in her profile?

What to Say: “Hey, that’s so cool you’re an ARTIST. What’s the best
and scariest thing about your job?
A message like this is great on multiple levels.
It proves you read her profile. She’ll be flattered you’re interested in her life and opinions – rather than just her pictures.
She’ll be impressed that you asked her the best question she’s received (probably all month). And she’ll be more much likely to reply to YOU instead of the guy who just
said, “Hey, what’s up?”

✔️ Make the Conversation Easy for Yourself:
Why: Learn a couple of tricks to save time and energy.
You deserve it, man!

How: There’s a couple of ways to do it. After she replies to your first message, you usually visit her profile again to figure out what to say next, right?
Next time, while re-reading her profile, make a few notes about conversation topics for future messages.
(Put it in an email draft, your Notes app, whatever.) This way, you don’t have to spend time looking for more things to talk about with every message.

⭐HERE ARE WHAT TO NOTE
1) What you have in common.
This is the easiest way to start a conversation. Make sure you ask a question to prompt a response from her.
Questions = continuing conversation.
What to Say: Which storyline is your favorite, right now?”

2) Things you don’t have in common.
Sparking a (friendly) debate is engaging. Engaging conversations are interesting,
and keep her interested.
What to Say: “So I see you’re really into CARDI-B
I have to say, she’s really disappointed me in the last couple of years. Do you see something I’m missing in her new stuff that could change my mind?”

3) Ways to add to something she has in her profile.
Recommendations for new restaurants, books, movies, games,
etc. are friendly, low-pressure, and all-around awesome.

My own profile mentioned my love for Nigerian writers, and some of my favorite messages were from guys who suggested new authors for me to check out. They sparked some
great conversations about books we both loved.
Your notes will keep the conversation flowing quickly and easily, so you’ll keep her on the hook.

4) Hold Her Attention.
Why: Smart guys are vigilant about keeping message conversations going. People can be busy, forgetful, and distracted. But when she’s having a great time messaging you, she won’t forget about you.
How: Using the techniques above, keep asking her about her life, interests, similarities, and differences. You’ll be a breath of fresh air after all those other guys who ask the boring “So how was your weekend?” follow-up message. You
have way more to discuss before resorting to weekend plans.

What to Say: Ask follow-up questions that jump off your original questions.
Ask her what CARDI-B like live. What’s are her favorite lyrics?
Ask her what game she plays with her friends on game night.

When she asks you questions, respond, and then relate the question back to her, or ask, “How about you?” to keep the conversation going.

Be curious, and show her you want to know her thoughts. Before you know it, the conversation will be flowing. After a couple of awesome message exchanges, she’ll be ready to continue the conversation in person. Get ready to ask her out!

⭐ 7 WAYS TO CATCH A WOMAN’S ATTENTION (AND KEEP IT!)
As a man, there’s a harsh truth that I have to admit, most men are terrible at flirting.Are there exceptions to that rule? Of course not. Whenever a man is struggling to flirt with a girl, there always seems to be a suave Brazilian helicopter pilot nearby who can swoop in
and talk about anything.
However, that doesn’t mean all hope is lost, dudes, If you really want to know how to get a girl to like you, flirting isn’t the answer.

That sounds counter-productive, but there’s only so far you can get with a woman by tenaciously pursuing her. If she wasn’t interested in the first place, she’s going to
put an end to that really fast. The key is making her do an equal share of the work. You need to make a girl want you as much as you want her.

But how do you accomplish that? How do you convince a woman that she should be attracted to you? If you’re struggling to figure out how to attract women, here are 7 techniques that will make a girl like you.

1. Be curious.
Ask her about herself. Be genuinely interested in learning about her life and the things that are important to her.
Don’t be a creepy stalker about it, but show her that you actually care enough to ask follow-up questions.

2. Have a life of your own.
The flip-side of being curious is being prepared to answer questions about yourself. And the last thing you want to do if a woman wants to know more about you is to act
bored about your own life.
Don’t respond with shrugs or say “I don’t have much going on.” Have stuff going on. Have passions, interests, things you’re excited to talk about. Give her a reason to want to know
more about you.

3. Take care of yourself.
Presentation matters, you don’t have to be the most attractive guy in the world. Women have a long history of being okay with dating beneath their own level of hotness. But if they’re willing to overlook your love handles and thinning hair, you need to show some effort.

Keep the hygiene on point. Get a haircut. And don’t always wear the same hoodie. Show her that you actually know how to take care of yourself.

5. Let her see the best of you.
Think about this: what is your best self? Or when do you act like your favorite version of yourself? Is it when you’re out with friends? Is it playing sport? Is it hiking, doing charity, or just hanging out watching movies?

When possible, you want the woman you’re interested in to see you at your best.
So invite her out with your best friends. Or suggest going to a concert of your favorite band. Find opportunities to show her your most confident and happy self.

6. Make her laugh… in the right way.
“Women love a sense of humor” is an old cliché,
but it’s true. Being funny can be a really attractive quality if you do it right.You definitely don’t want to be funny in a mean way. Remember, show her your best. So, no making fun of people or making raw rude jokes. If you’re going to mock someone, mock yourself.
Make sure that she knows that your humor comes with a side of
empathy and self-awareness, but, you know… be really funny too.

7. Flirt a little bit.
I know I said flirting wasn’t the answer, but what I meant was, it’s not the only answer. When the moment presents itself, it’s not a bad thing to let a woman know that you see her as an attractive person.
keep things casual. Maybe just compliment her. Or tell her,
“Wow, you look great tonight.” But leave it there — don’t overdo it.

Just offer enough that she can tell that you think she’s awesome, but don’t actively hit on her to the point where she’s going to be uncomfortable hanging out with you anymore.If she picks up on the small openings you’re giving her, she’ll find a way to let you
know that she’s interested too. And if she doesn’t,
well… it wasn’t meant to be.

⭐WHAT DO WOMEN WANT?
As guys, we generally want success, respect, and sex. Those usually equate to love for us. For women, it’s not that simple, we think buying things impresses them.
We try to be taller or make more money to get the girl.
But is that really what they want?
What can we actually do to attract her?
1. Be A Great Leader

 

2.Communicate Actively
3. Put Others First
4 Have Manners
5. Be Family Oriented
6.Be Vulnerable
7. Stay Informed & Educated
8. Have A Sense Of Humor
9. Be Adventurous & Spontaneous
10. Know How To Fix Things
Apply these techniques and get her trapped.
Be the best man you can and make your woman
happy, her attention is the hook you need to make her
yours.

ALSO, READ How to fix a broken relationship

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Love & Dating

Signs of a controlling boyfriend

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Who is a controlling boyfriend?

You  May think you understand who a controlling boyfriend is, but have you thought about the dangers of dating a controlling boyfriend? If you don’t know what controlling boyfriends, or the inconspicuous signs of a controlling boyfriend, then this article is for you. Read on and find out.

A controlling boyfriend is a practically a controlling person, i.e a person who wants to have control in all that you do, not minding your privacy.

is practically a depressed and unhappy person, with very low self-esteem, and with serious problems in their relationships. He is always distrusting others and his partner. You never have peace, because you are not aware of your actions, but you are aware of the actions of others.

They think that they can have people in the time they need it, without caring about the commitments and needs of others. Controlling boyfriend become unbearable tyrants, and while the people who have their barker accept it that way, they are “calm.” But if the person complains about something, they immediately dismiss it and go what? you’ve offended him.

This usually happens in the workplace and all areas of your life; for example, if you are dating a controlling boyfriend, he never asks where you’d like to go for dinner. Rather, he takes you to the place where he chooses. And this continues in all other aspects of your life. Eliminating the right to comment or express that which you like or don’t like.

A controlling boyfriend is pending to check the phone of his partner from time to time, under the pretext of any “reason to distrust”; just to see the messages from his partner. Because they need to be in control and they think all the time that you are going to be unfaithful. The controller does not believe in anyone, not even his own shadow.

what makes you think you’re being controlled?

1. Does your boyfriend tells you to behave with your family or friends? Forever?

2 He does not know how to behave in public!
Sometimes, you’re afraid not to mention certain things, and makes you feel bad because you can’t express yourself freely right?

3. Has he ever told you how to dress? you almost ask each time what to wear?

4. You started taking drugs for appetite or started healthier food so that you do not have temptations at home. And, this is because he makes you feel worst about yourself?

5. You don’t say anything to him because you don’t want to make him feel bad. you’re as careful as possible with your words.

1. The control freak, furious and despot

being furious

This type of man is dedicated to controlling you by telling you what you have to do and how you should do it. He will do so by intimidating you with his anger and his fury. If you don’t do what he wants, he will get angry and be more aggressive.

This type of man is the most toxic. He is aggressive on a verbal level; all his controlling words and phrases are hostile and he seeks verbal confrontation. His philosophy is “either with me or against me”, challenging him will provoke screams and voices. In his voice, there is an alarmist point as if there was always an imminent danger. He will judge you very often: “No, that’s not right.” You have to do it like this. Are you not listening to me?

 

ALSO, READ 5 reasons why dating a Married man will lead to Heartbreak

2. The meddlesome rude and traitor

This character puts your things all the time as if they were his business and they try to manipulate the situation and you to take advantage or get you to do things his way. This control-freak will quickly give you his opinion (which you have not asked him) on how to lead your life (and that of others). He is not usually diplomatic and firmly clings to his opinions, so he is very critical and often speaks in direct and emphatic terms. He can twist your words and turn what you’ve done to turn it against you. He is also a master of sarcastic witticisms and deceptive flattery, meaning that it is not known if they are or not. This man tends to point fingers a lot, especially when he’s telling you what you should and shouldn’t do.

3. The self-destructive victim who sees everything black. The controlling-abusive boyfriend.

This type of man sees the world and life as a glass, half empty and not half full. Since he is always seeing the negative side and expecting the worst, negativity comes out of every pore. If by any chance things go well for him, he will do everything possible to sabotage his circumstances. This man carries a tremendous amount of emotional pain, which is why he sounds so negative and gives the impression that nothing is worth it.

Since he has low self-esteem and feels that the relationship is not going to work, he will constantly say things that he knows the relationship will not work, he will constantly say things that hurt him to provoke an argument. A common gesture of these men is to constantly move the feet or to cross and uncross the legs.

ALSO, READ Obvious signs your partner is cheating with a coworker

4.The scarecrow weak and without initiative

He is unable to decide anything and is usually carried away by people’s opinions. He lives in fear and will never create any conflict or vindicate himself or anyone else.

This personality is not capable of facing people so he stays out of any challenging or uncomfortable talk. It is his intention not to create conflicts that make him irritating and offensive.

5. The egocentric narcissist whose motto is: I, my, me, with me and for me. The controller with no emotion.

A controlling boyfriend’s only concern is himself. He is the center of the universe and he expects you to consider him just that. The only thing that matters to him about you is what affects him or has something to do with him. If you are not willing to do anything for him, you will be of no use to him.

It is difficult to have a conversation with a controlling boyfriend because everything that is said will end up coming back to him. A controlling boyfriend doesn’t care what you say or answer him, he will keep talking and talking until he is done with what he wanted to say. His conversation reveals that he wants to be treated better than everyone else. Usually, a controlling boyfriend is attracted to vulnerable victims because then he can feel superior and will emotionally punish anyone who seems inferior to him for disappointing him.

It is what he spits out: “You would be nothing if it weren’t for me” or “Without me now you will be on the street”, they are usually followed by phrases that show how unhappy you are and that you are worthless.

6. The emotional freezer

He is cold and shows almost no emotion. He stops seeing very little of himself and he is a man of few words, so you never know what he thinks or what he feels.

The emotional freezer is stingy with words. As he will not let you know how he feels, you will always have to be guessing and you will be permanently left with the feeling of unease and insecurity. If he thinks that with time you can change him, you are wrong.

7. The socio psychopath

socio psychopath

He is the most toxic and dangerous type and they can cause you great harm. They usually make a memorable first impression, because he tells you everything you want to hear. He will want to know what you like, he makes you happy, he makes you sad so he can control your emotions, which he doesn’t have. He will not hesitate to lie to you to get what he wants and you will hear from him many sadistic comments, but the clearest sign that you are facing a sociopath is that he will contradict himself in the same sentence.

8.A controlling boyfriend lacks confidence in himself.

In their mind, you are challenging their authority when you do not agree with them or do not carry out their wishes.
In conjunction with mood swings, people with temper flare-ups can be troublesome because you never know what posture to take with these people. Unfortunately, your inability to handle your anger or resentment can result to assault.

Think about how this person reacts to common questions. Questions can reveal quite a few things when it comes to a controlling person when they respond in a frustrated or condescending way:

As stated above, a controlling boyfriend thinks that you can read their mind. If you ask them simple questions about what to do together, where to go, what it is they want, etc., they can easily get frustrated because they expect you to have all their needs in mind and above yours.

The questions imply that a decision has to be made, and a controlling boyfriend, believes that the decision is already made, being everything to them and their convenience.
Controlling boyfriend, often assume they understand how you think, even when they don’t. They can get frustrated because the image they have built of you does not correspond to what you say.

Questions can irritate a controlling boyfriend because they prefer to be in control when asking questions, and not others.

Questions can state for a controlling boyfriend d that the questioner needs help and control because they do not know the answer.

This can be aggravated over time because the controller seeks to be in control.

9. A controlling boyfriend is an Emotional blackmailer.

Sex is also harmful. Sexuality between lovers should be a way to bond, to feel complete, and to connect, but sometimes it ends up being one of the reasons for breaking up. Not so much because difficulties arise, which can be overcome, but because it becomes a way of using the other or making them feel bad. In this sense, there are cases in which, according to Granados, it is observed that “a member of the couple limits, manipulates, restricts freedom in making decisions about how to have sex or not, or even in the use or not contraceptives ”. In this case, the job is for the other party to wake up and run away looking for a much healthier relationship.

If you have found any of the traits that we have mentioned above; Beware!! you’re been controlled. But don’t worry, with our advice you can get out of this ugly situation in a simple way.

A Word From Relationshipseeds

Do not beg to be in a person’s life, you are not that hopeless.

Though it may crush you and feel like the world is spinning you into dizzy darkness, there’d always be someone else to bring you back your light, someone who wants to bring you light, and at no cost. You’ve got your light anyway, rediscover it.

Sometimes, we get so emotional about trying to correct that we ignore the process of correction and just focus on the result. We, forget also, that the result will forever be a product of the process that birthed it so a person who was corrected by being crushed and humiliated will become the teacher or leader who crushes others thinking they are being taught or made better.

It is commendable to see the room get better and try to affect it on someone, it is heroic to do this in the face of the rejection of the lesson or upgrade (some of us are just too stubborn to be corrected, yeah I know) but it is going to be almost impossible to justify doing this by crushing the person. This is not tough love, it is what many tyrants are made of, something we do not want to be. Similar to raising a voice or being abusive, belittling a person does not tell a tale of their character, it tells a tale of our character and the huge hole in our ability to teach. In the end, the person is left depressed rather than energized from the message, an anti-climax of sorts.
This is a message, first to me, then to you.

ALSO, READ Relationship and Marriage  Quotes by Reno Omokri

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Love & Dating

5 reasons why dating a Married man will lead to Heartbreak

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dating a married man

Marriage is a wonderful Union, which is made between a man and woman who turn to become husband and wife. It is Union where this both parties should understand that their togetherness is not just for a while or for the moment but forever.

In today’s world, the word “Marriage” has changed, the purpose of which marriage is such to be fulfilled has lacked its source. Some marriages nowadays are in higgledy-piggledy because of infidelity and sometimes lack consistency and dedication. Some married men tend to look away from their various homes because of a lack of understanding and sometimes a little mischievous attitude which one party tends to portray.

Some men in today’s world have already made it normal not to be submissive to their partner even when they’ve already taken a vow on it. They care less and some even go to the extent of threatening to deal with you if you dare open up to relatives.

“A woman some years back divorced her husband because she wasn’t getting enough of him, even when she tried her best in the area of communication, to know or rather find out the husband’s reason for always not making out time for them. But it yielding any result so on a very good day she found out that her husband has been frolicking with another lady outside their marriage, at first she didn’t believe what she saw. She caught her husband making out with another lady on their matrimonial bed.
After this scenario happened, the husband warned her strictly to keep her mouth shut. He threatened to deal with her if she dares to tell anyone.

after few years of this experience filed for divorce Because she can’t stay in the marriage again.
So, they are really men out there who have no reason for playing wrong on their marriage. They just do it for doing’s sake and in the end, they themselves end up destroying and losing their marriage.

On the other hand, the ladies make matters worst in Society today. A few research done shows that some ladies date married men because of the pleasure they get, in other to sustain life. Some regard it as what they call “Cruise” and accompany it with a saying “Enjoy it while last, that nothing lasts forever.
This truly has put some family, marriage into confusion because the partner sometimes tends not to understand the fire he is bringing to his home.
To some ladies, the married are the ones that spend more on them and even take good care of them, therefore, there’s no need of dating or hanging with single men/guys.

This really has caused a lot of Heartbreaks even without knowing because, in the end, some ladies might not know they are dating a married man. While some intentionally do it because of fun and sometimes do it as a pay-back period.
Indeed, this is becoming alarming to Society and trying to curb it seems not to be abortive because some ladies on their own, have taken it as an oath to date a married man without valuing or regarding that it has its own repercussions.

The men on their own, sometimes drag this on their head, because they’ve refused to build their homes the way they should be.
A man had a misunderstanding with his wife, instead of him fixing the problem, he left his home and never returned until three days. He angrily left to see one of his female folks who vehemently refused to sleep with him the very day he had this misunderstanding with his wife. Alas, the very day he discovered that the lady is the daughter of his wife’s friend.
Now, what is this man suppose to do??
A misunderstanding that could be fixed within few minutes, would have ruined his home.

Indeed dating a Married man will surely lead to Heartbreak, because Marriage itself is a lifetime vow, even when many tend to take leave, the vow on the altar has already been made.

ALSO, READ 9 MISTAKES PEOPLE MAKE IN A RELATIONSHIP ( AVOID THEM)

Five reasons why dating a Married man will lead to Heartbreak

1. They will never leave their home:

No matter how committed a man is in a relationship outside his home, he will never turn his back on them. Because, no matter how a man will love you in a relationship outside his home, he will always sacrifice his love, care, and attention for his family. He wouldn’t want his home tear apart because he is with you.
You will always have to dance and believe his excuses because you will always want him, his attention and all. So there’s a 100 percent tendency that you will surely suffer from Heartbreak if you are dating a married man.

A man started dating outside his marriage because he is not getting enough of his wife,(he refused to initiate communication)and the wife, on the other hand, didn’t know about this, she never noticed she’s not giving enough. He kept frolicking with side maiden, promising her heaven on Earth and so, but what happened at the end. He later left his beautiful maiden and went back to talk out things with his wife.
So no matter how you fall in love, never dream of falling for a Married man.

2. Time Difficulties:

A married man won’t have time for you because they’ll spend 80% of their time with their family and would give you little or less attention because they know it’s not a wasted time. Being with you is just to cool off the moment, while they wait and settle for other things that don’t even involve you in the picture. They will always give excuses of which you have no choice but to accept.

3. No active Communication:

You don’t expect a man who already has a family to maintain an active Communication with you. No, it’s not possible. Even while at home with his family, he always finds a way or rather tells you not to call him when he’s home. No time to express your so-called feelings or to talk about where the relationship is heading to.

4. There’s no hope for the future:

You have no future with a married man because already, he has settled with his own family. You’ll only be there wasting Your precious time being faithful to someone who’s already committed to his family.

5. The man will stick to his family:

A married man will never leave his family

I know of a student who dated a Married man. Yes, she got everything she ever wanted, but there was a warning given to her by this man.
“No matter how we roll with each other, just know that I can never leave my family because of you, what we are doing is just for the moment, so be careful with us.”

So, no man in his right sense will leave his family just because they want to satisfy your unnecessary pleasures, it is never done. If they have kids at home, they can sacrifice the whole world just to stick and make a responsible father or Dad and also a good husband to their wives. You being there is just a waste of time and energy, because you can never get to know his family or even any of his relatives.

Dating is not a crime, but dating someone who has already found his life partner is out of the box because you as a young lady will get to lose many things, Heartbreak too. So in all you do, tend to find someone who will really care and give you the full attention that you need, not a Married man who already has whom he wants, need and whom he has already chosen to care, love and his attention to. Be Wise!

ALSO, READ THE FUNDAMENTALS OF DATING

 

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Love & Dating

7 Tips to Improve Your Mental Health and Relationships

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mental health

Mental health is vital to our overall wellness because it affects how we think, feel, and behave in our daily life. Working to improve it can help both you and your relationships with others.

Benefits of Improving Your Mental Health

Building resilient mental health can empower your life in many ways. Although many associate good mental health with overcoming depression or anxiety, there’s far more to it than that. The way we think about the things we do every day is dependent upon our mental health, and the benefits of good mental health include:

  • Increased self-esteem
  • Reduced anxiety
  • Greater sense of inner peace
  • Enhanced mood
  • Improvement in relationships

Benefits of Improving Your Relationships

Developing positive relationships offers a multitude of benefits, including:

  • Boosts feelings of happiness
  • Lowers stress
  • Promotes healthier behaviors
  • Improves healing
  • Provides a greater sense of purpose

Improving your mental health and, in turn, your relationships with others can be achieved using the following simple, yet vital tips.

7 Life-Changing Tips to Improve Your Mental Health

  1. Diet and Exercise — Getting the proper nutrients and physical movement can enhance our moods and provide long-term health benefits.
    1. Foods to include in the diet — The following foods can help boost our spirits:
      1. Fresh fruits and green leafy vegetables
      2. Omega-3 fatty acids, which are found in various fish and seafood.
      3. Healthy fats, including avocados and nuts
    2. Foods to avoid in diet — The following foods are best to avoid as they can negatively affect one’s mood:
      1. Trans fats or anything that contains “partially hydrogenated” oils
      2. Fried foods
      3. Refined carbs and sugary snacks
    3. Physical Exercise — When we exercise, it increases the brain’s blood flow and regulates dopamine and serotonin levels, influencing our moods. There are many exercises to choose from, but the following can have a particularly powerful impact on improving mental health:
      1. Resistance training can include lifting weights or any weight-bearing activity that helps to build muscle and bone density.
      2. Pilates and Yoga are highly beneficial for strengthening the muscles and improving balance, but they also improve mental health through controlled breathing and mindful thinking.
      3. Cardiovascular training includes walking, running, and cycling, all of which get the heart pumping and blood flowing, allowing endorphins to be released.

Engaging in positive lifestyle changes, such as a proper diet and regular physical exercise can be achieved by utilizing holistic mind and body fitness, which provides overall wellness for both the mind and body through natural sources.

2.Sleep — Getting enough quality sleep every night is imperative to both the body and mind. Inadequate sleep can impair thinking and behaviors, which may lead to other mental health problems such as depression and anxiety. A few ways to improve sleep quality include:

    1. Relaxation techniques — These include controlled breathing, meditation, and visualization.
    2. Lifestyle changes — Excluding alcohol and caffeine before bed can help, along with turning off all electrical devices that emit blue light.
    3. Aromatherapy — Utilizing essential oils in the air such as lavender can help improve sleep quality.

3.Meditation and Mindfulness — When we practice meditation and mindfulness, we stay in the moment and avoid focusing on past regrets or anxieties about the future.

    1. Set time aside to meditate — Meditation can be done at any time of the day for as little as five minutes.
    2. Create a space of your own — You can create this space at home or work; what’s important is to make it your area and tune out all distractions.
    3. Focus only on your breath — Staying focused on your breathing helps clear the mind of any unwanted thoughts.

4.Practice Gratitude — Having a positive mental attitude can improve mental health immensely.

    1. Have an attitude of gratitude — Start each day by writing down three to five things you are grateful for, and that will start your day on a positive note.
    2. Keep a gratitude journal — When things happen that you feel thankful for, write them down. Then, when you are feeling sad, you can open the journal and get reacquainted with that more positive, grateful feeling.
    3. Volunteer — Take a day out of your month and volunteer for a meaningful cause such as an animal shelter or homeless shelter. This can provide a healthy dose of gratitude and a greater sense of overall well-being.

5.Relaxation and Deep Breathing Techniques — Relaxation helps decrease stress, and deep breathing helps shift the body into a calmer state by tapping into the parasympathetic system. One of the best ways to do this is with the 4-7-8 technique.

    1. Start by inhaling a deep breath through the nose for four seconds.
    2. Hold your breath for seven seconds.
    3. Exhale with pursed lips through the mouth, creating a whooshing sound for eight seconds.

When you breathe in, it activates the part of the nervous system responsible for the fight-or-flight adrenaline releasing action.

6.Nurture Yourself Through Nature — Being in nature, whether for a leisurely walk or adventurous hike, has been shown to reduce stress, anxiety, and depression while increasing pleasant feelings. There are other ways to include nature in your daily life.

    1. Gardening — Planting and growing flowers, herbs, and vegetables is a boost for your mental and physical health, as you can reap the rewards of both beauty and nutrition.
    2. Bring nature indoors — Including house plants adds beauty, but it also has health benefits as they assist in humidifying and purifying the air, which aids your respiration and breathing.
    3. Walk or ride a bike to destinations — By incorporating exercise with the great outdoors, you are getting double the benefit through movement and nature.

7.Therapy — When it comes to improving mental health and relationships, the benefits of therapy are unsurpassed. You can also receive these astounding benefits in the privacy of your own home through telehealth therapy. Many different forms of treatment can be used.

    1. Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT) — This highly effective therapy involves identifying and changing a person’s thinking and behavior patterns and replacing them with more functional thoughts and behaviors.
    2. Interpersonal Therapy — This form of therapy focuses on how a person interacts with others, notices negative patterns, and replaces them with more positive actions.
    3. Couples Therapy — Many relationships can benefit significantly from couples counseling, during which trained professionals offer insight and tools to improve communication.

Therapy offers a positive life-changing opportunity that can be utilized in daily life, so the benefits are long-lasting. Learning new ways of thinking about things that would typically cause stress or anxiety from a trained professional helps to develop coping skills and knowledge that can last a lifetime.

holding hands

Start turning negative thoughts into positive actions by utilizing simple daily activities to improve your mental health and relationships.


About the Author:

Tess DiNapoli is an artist, freelance writer, and content strategist. She has a passion for yoga and often writes about health and wellness, but also enjoys covering the fashion industry and world of fitness.

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