Last Updated on June 11, 2022 by Joshua Isibor
One of the things ravaging trust in a relationship is having an external affair. Once you’re discovered to be cheating in a relationship, you automatically lose your partner’s trust. What comes to mind then is “how to rebuild the lost trust in your relationship after cheating”; hence this article.
It is paramount for us to know that our relationship can go back to the way it used to be or even become better than its original state when we make up our mind to work on it.
If you ever find yourself cheating in a relationship and you truly desire to set things right with your partner, here is a list of things to do:
10 Practical Ways to Rebuild Trust After Cheating in a Relationship
1. Own Your Mistake
Fifty percent of the reason most people cheat on their partner is that their relationship is no longer as enjoyable as it used to be. Over time, their partner has become a boring fellow and they no longer communicate as couples should.
Although, that shouldn’t be an alibi for you to cheat but since the deed has been done, You’ve got to take responsibility for your actions and never try to play the blame game even though your partner pushed you into it.
Accept that you are at fault and try to show how sorry you are. One secret you should know is that; owning up to your mistake will make your partner think about giving you a second chance.
2. Allow your partner to vent it out
No sane partner is happy with the fact that they were cheated on. Trust me when I say “it’s a big blow on the face”. So, you should be ready to absorb the outburst of his/her anger. The fact that she/he is pouring out the anger within is an indication that s/he loves you and is not ready to hold back offenses. At the end of all the emotional display, you can chip in this simple word: ” I am sorry”. Then be sure to begin the process of restitution from there.
ALSO, READ How to mend broken trust in a relationship
A problem discussed is a problem half solved. In the journey to rebuilding trust in your relationship, communication is a key factor. Both parties will have to have an honest conversation on what led to the act of Cheating, some possible faults from both ends that could have fostered the act, down to as little as the changes they have been experiencing in their relationship prior to the Cheating incidence.
No details should be spared. Be as vulnerable as you can. Vulnerability is necessary because your findigs will go a long way in fixing your relationship, so give it your best shot!
4. Apologize Sincerely
Make sure to meet with your partner to tender a sincere apology. I could have just said apologize to your partner but I decided to add “sincerely” to tell you that your apology shouldn’t be a casual one.
At this point, you have to say what you mean and mean what you say. Trust me; your partner can tell whether you truly feel sorry for the act, or you’re just apologizing to fulfill all righteousness. Sincerity is one language that is louder than words-Let your partner see truthfulness in your apology and never try to fake it.
5. Try to Make Amends
like it is generally said; “Action speaks louder than words”. In order to make restitution in your relationship; you must CUT all ties with your fling. Let your partner know that henceforth, you will no longer have anything whatsoever to do with that person (not even their contact number).
This is necessary because your partner will not be able to trust you if you still have a connection with that fellow. Don’t forget: a baby snake that is left unattended today, will grow old to become a mighty serpent that would be chasing you out of your home. Beyond all reasonable doubt, prove to your partner that you are ready to turn a new leaf.
6. Show more commitment
The fact that you’re ready to win back your partner’s trust is an indication that you have to be more committed to the relationship. Devote more time to things that you think will add more spice to your relationship which in turn will make it work out. Some of the commitments you can bring to the table are:
– Regular check-ups on your partner.
– keeping to your promises.
– paying more attention to your partner’s needs.
– Being affectionate.
– Being as transparent as possible…
ALSO, READ How to Build a Lasting Relationship
7. Start Afresh
To rebuild the lost trust in your relationship is synonymous with starting the relationship from scratch. You will have to go back to the beginning to bring back that garnish that made the relationship what it was. Try to reconnect to your partner both physically and emotionally. It’s not going to be an easy task but you will have to put in your best.
You can send love texts regularly, buy gifts or flowers, go on a vacation or picnic, do the things that excite him/her, and watch how you gradually win them back emotionally and otherwise.
8. Let Time has its Cause
Time, they say is the best healer. After all, has been said and done, give your partner time to heal.
This point ought to have been the first but I deliberately brought it down to tell you that you need to give your partner enough time both at the initial stage of finding out about your indulgence and even after doing all your best to work things out.
Usually, when your partner finds out that you have been Cheating, He/ She will stay away from you as your sight would be disgusting to him/her. In this situation, don’t rush things. Give them their space to calm down. Even you that cheated need some time alone to sort things out.
Do not be in a hurry to win back the trust of your partner after Cheating. Remember, it took time to build trust in your relationship, it will also take time to rebuild it!
9. See a Counselor
This process is necessary to help your relationship heal properly. Of course, you should know that your partner may forgive you but still find it difficult to truly trust you. In this case, you need the help of a third party (counselor) to counsel you through the healing process.
10. Pray about it
The Bible book of Philippians chapter 4:6 made us understand that: we should pray about everything, no matter how minor or major it seems to be, and this case is not left out.
That same Bible told us in the book of Proverbs 21:1 that “The king’s heart is in the hand of God, as the rivers of water; He turns it wherever He will”. So, the heart of your partner is in God’s hands and with continuous prayers, God will turn his/her heart to trust you again.
I’d like to say that; the act of rebuilding your partner’s trust after cheating on him/her is not an easy one. But with hard work, patience, time, coupled with all of the processes mentioned above, your relationship will regain her lost trust and begin to thrive.
Wish you all the best!
ALSO, READ Undeniable Signs A Married Man Is Using You
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